When our forefathers came to this land many years ago, they established, what is now,  a yearly tradition. One that is celebrated by all, regardless of religion, race, color or creed.  Like butter to bread and apples to pie, there is nothing more American than Football on Thanksgiving.  According to the archives, it was because of the thanksgiving game in 2012 that Kut found Jewball.  (Also the last time that you’ll see those two things in the same sentence.)

Thanksgiving weekend is a series of 4 games in as many days. So when signups started, we expected a big flurry of activity, but like Rabin’s game, we knew the talent was there, but it was lacking. Through sheer grit and determination, we got 14 for Thursday, with a late signup by Mo as the opposing QB.

All was set…except the weather, 80% chance of rain, not looking good, but Commish had faith, he told us to hang on. Even on erev chag, Jordan said “wait until the am to make the call” and wait we did. The rain came, the clouds were there. Even at 7am, questions were still raised. But the rain seemed to be passing. Jordan made the call at 7:30. Game is ….ON! Like pigeons to a breadcrumb, the players came from everywhere, some sitting in traffic, others complaining about accidents. Regardless of origin, we arrived at the field to commence the 27th annual Jewball Turkey Bowl!

Teams were Old school vs New, Orange vs Brown, Native Americans vs Pilgrims. J, Bin, Kut, Big E, Steve O and Dave O Glick vs Mo, Salem, Legs, Wilmer, Sam, MK and Maor. Speed vs size. Old vs. Young.

As the game started, the heavens shined down upon us and the rain stopped. Rain is good for the ground and all, but certain things are given priority.

I could recap the game, but there was a lot of nothing. The wind played great defense and made balls miss on both sides of the field. Lots of running by Mo and lots of classic Rabin plays. Defense was solid on both sides and neither team was giving up much room. You know it’s a problem when Kut has more receptions than anyone else on the team. (FTR, he hasn’t dropped a pass in over 8 games.)  Some key plays: Jordan missing an easy catch that would’ve given us a 1-0 lead. Kut teaching Legs and Sam what a crackback feels like. Steve-O coming up with 2 huge picks, one a 95 yard return to greatness.  Mo trying to match that and going 80 yards before being brought down by Jordan and Kut. Jeremy catching 1 of 3 deep passes and running it in for a TD.  Mark being his usual self with great hands and making people miss. Legs flying all over the field, breaking up every play.  Big E finally understanding how accurate the chat was on Rabin’s huddle style. “you, run a slant” (and also cracking up about Glick’s.) BD, doing what BD does. Guy can still play, can’t wait to see you on the field more often. Dave-O calling the defense, kinda.

Final score was 1-1, a tie. But today wasn’t about scores or stats. It was about spending time with family and doing what we love. Jewball fam is stronger than blood. (Unless it’s Zada’s in J’s cap.) It was about getting out and playing ball, regardless of weather. While 2020 has been a hell of a year, Jewball has remained constant. It is the reprieve from the chaos. A safe haven from insanity. It is something that people can’t understand unless they’ve played. (and survived the chat)

So when we go around the thanksgiving feast tonight, I know that when asked what I’m thankful for, the answer is easily, JEWBALL!!

Game 1

As the players took the field there was one question to be answered. “where is everyone?” Traffic, which was the theme of this game. This was a battle of the defenses and there was plenty of coverage across the field. There were no uber open guys and all the plays were fought for. Pringles and his color crew took the ball first against a Singer/Munch defense scheme. Munch leading the line battle with Sam son of Prime and Singer setting the field looking to back the containment and shut down gains with Feit and Steve-o on the outsides and PJs and Ivry taking the middle. Game underway munch and sam bringing pressure putting up the good fight against Walls and Kut keeping the pressure on Pray. Swats and coverage put the ball in Feit’s hands soon after to battle Mighty, Dobs, Goldberg, and Gronk. A defense that does not like to miss flags. Fortunately, Mighty isn’t the only shifty player and Feit and Steve-o were causing misses with help from the excellent blocking up the field (except for that first play). The defenses held on and ball was going back and forth with only yards to show and an injured baller. Beast who knows to be at both games was there to step in and step up. Between the good picks and the Yaron-style off the receiver ones the game was up in the air everyone playing strong. At some point Singer stole one out of the air and brought it back for a score. Kut had a nice play up the sideline for a pylon touchdown*. Goldberg bullied the D as Pray snuck one into him in the endzone. Singer grabbed a well-placed beauty from Feit in tight coverage across the field in the other endzone. Dobs reeled one in on defense at some point because he wanted to touch the ball and keep his rep high for the fiancé. When Pray was not being sacked he was running from munch and Sam. When he had more time the jump ball to Gronk often worked. The Singer/Steve-o screens fight set up usually grabbed some yards if Steve-o didn’t step out avoiding prays wicked reach. The smart quick plays to get firsts avoiding Walls and Kut kept the momentum. Ultimately the defense stopped anyone else from scoring (and when they couldn’t a “respected” call was always there to help) and the game ended up in a tie. Good effort all around.
Top plays and props (no Jewball): Kut scored* beautiful pass from Feit to meet Singer in the endzone. A masterful block and run with Munch and Steve-o up the middle. An awesome run by Feit being shifty, screaming stuff, and following the blocks. Gronk grabbing balls out the air in unreachable territory for the defense (well place pray) Walls laughing at some bad attempts to block him as he pushed though. Excellent coverage and attitude by PJs. Dobs excellent flag pulling amongst Mighty and Gronk. Goldberg manning up this game and playing great. Signer dominating offense and defense. And great pressure on the line keeping pray on the move.

Game 2

As my intention upon arriving was to set up on grass, in the same way our ancestors did, I entered LHS and turned left, as our ancestors did, and parked by the softball field….as ancestors did. It was a really nice mix of old and new. Going through familiar motions from Jewball’s storied past, but setting up the field for the current generation. But also knowing that Klink, Tom, and Rabin would join me on the field I was building. That Mighty was playing next door – still being mighty. Steveo as well. We had done our jobs. We had maintained the tradition but also passed it on. These were thoughts percolating through my head as I serenely walked the field dropping cones, occasionally taking the time to kick a goose turd to the side. Ah, kicking goode turds…how i missed you. I had to set up the field because Yaron was coming straight from work and would not make it before 945. It was 915, and….

“Do you need more cones?!”

My concentration broken. The nostalgia lost. There was Yaron. He made it back early. Within 10 minutes he had reset the entire field.

Made it over to the turf to see the end of a tie game stay tied. Looked like a good game, but did not see any big plays. It went slightly into OT and the soccer guys were buzzing around the field like flies. Shoo!!!

I will begin by rejecting a myth outright. Actually two myths. 1.) Game 2 is a weaker game 2.) Grass is a weaker game. Neither are true. The players who sign up are responsible for the level of quality and satisfaction of the game. You get out what you put in. This is in a way why I like the world of EITHER. The world of Both lead to a sense of an entitlement and laziness. Of collecting stats. Of spreading out the energy output. Now….u get your game….and u best give it everything you got.

Yaron took ball first and drove the field. Rabin kept promoting his team’s need to bend and not break. And they listened by bending the entire length of the field. However, with Beast going stop and go deep to the left deep corner of the endzone, Jordan sniffed it out and picked the ball off with Beast right behind him.

Rabin, whose arm looked MUCH better than his last start, quickly converted the turnover into points. Placed a ball just over the top of the defender down the right sideline to a leaping (or tiptoeing) Pray. With no one behind him, Pray runs it 65 yards to score and put Rabin up 1-0. Now, Yaron was not struggling at all. He was pinpoint accurate and finding his guys open – even in tight windows – throughout the first half, but the drops were inexplicable and contagious. Beast losing control of one. Prime fumbling a ball in the endzone that him in the chest with no one around him. Stephen doing the same thing (but more about his debut later). Rabin was having no problem making hay with his receivers. He even threw to Whiskey once. (At the end of the game Whiskey volunteered to play line in a big spot. Straight face in the huddle: “You’re not not throwing to me anyway.”) When a mismatch between Salem and Klink presented itself, Rabin threw a deep ball that Salem hauled in, sliding at the front of the endzone. 2-0 Rabin and looking promising at the half. But Yaron wasn’t out of the game, because Rabin and crew kept bending. In fact, they were bending and breaking. The only reason the game was not tied was because of the drops. Yaron was using Tom very effectively to move the ball downfield on many TE rollout. Rabin and Colors started missing flag grabs on first attempts which allowed first downs and kept drives alive that should have been bottled up. Yaron started picking on the Tabak with Stephen being the taller receiver and even with Tabak draped on him, the jump balls went to Sting most of the time. Eventually one was caught for a point. 2-1 Rabin. But on the very next play, Rabin and Jordan hooked up (party like its 1999) for a circle route and run – 73 yards to a score! The lead is extended with 40 minutes to go. Yaron, beginning to wake up and his team making plays – including a huge first down snag by Prime – scored again with Stephen cutting to the middle of the endzone. Now 3-2 with about 20 minutes left. Here is where things really started to go off the rails for Rabin. On a 4th and long at Yaron’s 20, Rabin called a bold play. Pitch to Pray – who had thrown a few balls for Colors but nothing worked out – one was picked – then a throw back to Rabin….who was supposed to find Jordan cutting left to right in the endzone. When Jordan got to his spot, Rabin had already received the toss from Pray and Rabin threw a bullet which Jordan caught. TD!!! Amazing execution and a two score lead with about ten minutes left in the game! Wait…wait…..calling it back….The pass from Pray to Rabin was a forward pass…..Rabin’s strike is called off. No score. No two point lead.

Clinging to a one point lead now, the defense needs to make a stop and secure the game. Swarming around Yaron and going for the sack…..Yaron splits the rushers and tried to run for a first down. Before he can make it to the marker, his clears gets stuck in some dirt and he goes down. He goes down softly but he is rolling around and saying Oh no oh no. Its bad, he says. Worse than the last time, he says. He tries to get up. Not happening. He cannot put any pressure on it. Prime, Jordan and a few others are really upset. No, not because they care about Yaron being healthy or even surviving…but because how can we finish the game?? Meanwhile, people with actual souls like Tom, Beast, and Stephen are carrying Yaron off the field. Those who remain on the field and left Yaron for dead are negotiating how to finish the game. Trade Pray….trade Rabin….Regardless, it felt like Rabin’s win was assured. The loss of Yaron could not be made up for. Just as Pray was about to decide if he could take snaps for the opposition…..Yaron is seen jogging. Wait, no prancing! Legit he is hopping around doing Tik Tok dances! What happened??? Apparently, ya see…it was simply the patella so all u gotta do is snap it back in. Those who heard the snap and saw the maneuver claim they will never be the same. Jill was disgusted.

So, Yaron flosses his way back onto the field. But Colors still feels pretty good. Yaron is hurt. They are up 1. With one stop to make. They can taste the W.

On the next play Yaron throws a pick. Whiskey starts the process by making a great diving tip so Stephen can’t get a clean handle on the ball. It floats to Pray who picks it….no…wait….he doesn’t pick it…..He tips it as well! And it gently falls behind him…..into the waiting, opportunistic arms of Beast. Holy Skirtsteaks! Beast is all alone and jets to the endzone. Instead of a game ending pick…..we have a tie game with the clock all but run out. Rabin has little to no mojo left. A desperation hook and ladder elicits a goffer ball.

Game should be over being the time frame, but no one has anywhere to go and two Jewball ties in one week is bad for business. So, we play on. Yaron drives the field, once again with Stephen being the main target. And the new kid with chill demeanor and lengthy arms makes a nice toe tap grab in the back of the endzone to give Yaron the unlikey lead in OT. Rabin gets another crack at it, but the game ends on a Beast pick after a last gasp throw to Legs. A shame and disgrace for Rabin and Colors. A marvel and miracle for Yaron and Dark.

Yaron gets a most well earned Jewball. Combining all our favorite qualities. True grit and masterful skill.

See y’all tomorrow for Turkey Bowl.

Game 1

Week 5 brought back the very successful Jewball League pitting the two undefeateds against one another and the two winless teams going head to head. Once again, as the games were played, despite the currents standings where Ass Men dominate at 2-0 and 193 flail at 0-2, it became evident that this anyone’s tournament for the taking. The competition is fierce and it appears that whichever team executes on Game Day has every chance to win.
On another unseasonable day in November, the field was clear and shimmering. A glorious day for football. And we had it to ourselves (reminder that Week 7 is our last shared Sunday). Just like that, though, Week 5 is in the books and with that- one quarter of our season. It goes by…..and this time truly appreciated with pandemic numbers picking up around us. There was no signs of pandemic and plenty of sunshine last Sunday. Some late breaking wind came and went during Game 2, but Game 1 – Birds of Pray v. Ass Men was all good. Game 1 was to see who would start The League season up 2-0 so there was some extra juice. The Ass Men were at full power and looked formidable with Rabin leading (or at least playing QB for) Logan, Singer, Jordan, MK, Munch, Storm, and O. Birds were down one of their best weapons with Legs taking a Leg Day – the team replaced him with a combination of Big E and Zelner. Otherwise, it was nice to see Wilmer back on the field, looking well rested and ready to go. Rounding out the team was their QB Captain Pray and the core of Goldberg, Vegh, Prime, and PJs. The game began on time with Rabin taking ball first – and on those first two possessions, he really looked like the Bin-there-done-that QB who comes in like a lion, but plays like a lamb. He just did not seem comfortable in the pocket at all and once again was not able to complete a pass. And by pass I mean a 3-foot screen. Luckily for the Ass Men, the team is built to be a defensive juggernaut and between the pass rush of Munch and O and the aggressive defense of MK and Logan – Pray had very little room to operate. A lot of pressure was brought and his default running lanes were sniffed out and plugged up. For most of the game, the Ass Men were sniffing and plugging. Putting up a veritable wall of Ass which Pray could not penetrate no matter how hard he tried. And he tried all game. The problem was, on the other side of the field, Rabin could not get it up. By that, I mean he could not throw the ball anywhere but in the downward direction (with the exception of nice hook-up with Storm for 25 yards in the middle of the field). Numerous times, Rabin was seen spiking the ball on hike even though there was no play clock to stop and the idea was to gain yards. However, eventually, the Birds went for it at midfield and the Ass Men – lead all day by MK and O flying around to pull flags – held the line and gifted Rabin a short field. A play later, the Ass Crack Back was called and a hand off to Jordan running right, was able to use O and Singer blocks to weave through the defense and put up a score. The 1-0 lead actually held for most of the game. Pray was not his sharpest and threw 5 picks on the day, two for P6s. Definitely not what his team needed with very little margin for error. After one of those P6s by Singer, and the score a seemingly comfortable 2-0, the Birds finally put a point on the board. It was Goldberg in the back of the end zone, somewhat redeeming himself after an earlier drop of a possible TD. Bird droppings were actually a theme of the day – with the exception of Prime, Pray had some problems with his WRs making the big catches when needed. None more inexplicable than the perfect loft to Goldberg on a roll out. Goldberg bobbled the ball a number of times before seeming to completely secure it….before just laying it gently on the turf. Eother way, even with all the picks and misses, Birds were only down 2-1 with 30 minutes to play. But just as they were infused with sudden life, on the very next play – everything fell apart. Rabin at his own 5, after struggling all day and clinging to a one score lead – dumps the ball to Munch who darts toward the sideline to get as many yards as he can. He’s at the 10. Vegh meets him at the 15. There is some of collision or exchange or moment of truth where Vegh either attempts to push Munch out or grab his flags. But Munch has other plans and does not yield. The Birds are frozen. Munch keeps running. All the way to the end zone. He never went out. The play never stopped. That’s a TD. Now, to talk rulebook. 1.) Always keep playing until it is clear that the play is dead 2.) Vegh was the man on the play so he would be the one to call him down or out 3.) If someone is on the sidelines watching – they actually have the best opportunity to make those calls. The problem here was that Prime and Pray said they heard someone say that Munch stepped out. In the aftermath, no one claimed to be that person. If someone had called out, we would have had to respect the call – even if it was not true in actuality, but no one said they called out. And so….the play stands – Munch makes it 3-1 and that was too much for the Birds to overcome. Time expired them being down two scores. In a last bid to just play until the clock ran out, Jordan picks one and runs it back for a score, temporarily taking TD leader away from Mighty…Temporarily because Mighty and his Feit Club were up next. That recap…tomorrow.
Jewball in Game 1 goes to Singer even though there were plenty of worthy candidates. The 3 picks and the big 2nd TD to give his team some breathing room sealed his MVP status. But special shout out to Logan for being usual selfless and team leader self – bringing us together when needed and lighting a fire under our Ass Men when needed as well. As mentioned before, O, MK, and Munch were flying around pulling flags and making sure Pray never could do his thing. Giving Prime respect as well for looking like a real number 1 WR for the Birds. Making big time plays for them. The other Bird WRs need to up their game to match Prime – and good things will happen. 
You can sign up now for Week 6. Weather looks nice. First game on turf, second game on grass. Early, Late, or Either. If you say Both, it means Either to me, so I will decide for you which game you get – fair warning.

Game 2:

Jewballers have a lot of pride. In a way, when there is nothing on the line – and you are out there exerting best efforts – there is more on the line. Because if you are braving the elements, with nothing to gain in terms of reward, fame, or compensation – and you can suffer real injury at any moment – and the risk is so great – the game has to mean something. It has to. The win is all you have. Your performance – whether good or bad – either haunts you or carries you through the week. In a way, of all the experiences we have shared – it is the “feeling” of a Jewball Sunday that binds us. The relatable highs and lows. So, when the League started, that feeling…was enhanced just a bit. The elation of the win and the crush of the loss was just that much more intense and sensational. And so – when two 0-1 teams met last Sunday morning with the Jewball League basement on the line, there was definitely pressure. And the irony of course was that the game was being played by Jewball’s two premiere QBs. It was Feit’s Club against Yaron’s 193. Feit had lost the prior league week to the Ass Men in a close affair that had some replacement player controversy. Yaron had lost to the Birds of Pray in a close game as well where Dobs – the newly engaged Dobs! – played hero and Yaron and his team looked somewhat lost on offense.
With two weeks to regroup, both teams met on the field of battle looking to get their momentum going. The game started before the game with Gronk unavailable and Feit picking up Megatron – one of the most talented players to ever take the field as a Jewballer. Not a regular by any means, but when he does come down – he makes a difference. Size and speed and skill. An even replacement for Gronk? Sure. I see that – a good move by the Feit Club. But it wasn’t even Megatron’s day – in fact, he had a pretty rough day – looking like he needs to get back into Jewball for some reps. It was really a team effort by the Feit Club that made the difference. They showed why they were the favorites before the season began. There was Mighty getting the scoring started making so much happen after the catch – just magical stuff down the left sideline – slashing, zipping, spinning, stopping – and zipping again – the 193 were not up to the task of slowing down a motivated Mighty. 1-0 Feit Club.
So, it’s hard to write a recap for 193 games since I don’t know all the names of the players…but they did show up in Steelers jerseys that I assumed were from the old school team they played on. Then…when I saw the JB logo…I just….y’know….Yaron – you do you. And I hope you doing you doesn’t entail losing games for much longer. Yaron is a winning QB type, so I expect a turnaround. But it would not come on Sunday. He did have a player that could run the rock impressively – and even better – he brought his girl down to watch the game (always good for our rep – soccer guys can’t compete with that). So, props to that guy because he was a threat. But otherwise…not much for Yaron and his crew. Most notably, Prime’s own legitimate son, Sam, was a terror on the D line – twice sacking Yaron for a big loss – once in endzone. Meanwhile, on offense Feit was really running an efficient offense. Mighty looked like once again he had a sure TD, but…someone (see, I need the names of the 193) managed to track him down at 5 yard line. Feit failed to score in what should have been momentum shift in the game, but Yaron’s offense sputtered again. Some drops. Some mix-ups…just kinda messy.
Feit Club looked like its breakthrough was inevitable and it came in the form of Beast. The man leading the league in sacks, almost sacks, and bodying, scored two in a row on crosses and 40 yard runs after the catch to put his team up 3-1 (Yaron scored at some point). Yaron never threatened again and Feit tacked on a score with a beauty of a one-handed grab by Daveo at the 20 and a race to pay dirt. Much like in the early game, the demoralization of the losing team was capped by one final insult – a pick 6 to end the game. Megatron puts his mark on the game by giving Yaron one last stat. Feit Club climb to 1-1 and the 193 are still looking for a win.
 Credit to Feit Club for winning as a team. Mighty rotating out for a full set….just like someone who isn’t Mighty. Steveo was really good about that too. I think Steveo was on the sidelines for most of the game 🙂 Sam, giving the fans what they wanted by dropping a lollipop pass that was in the air for about a minute and everyone cleared out for him. C’mon, Sam! Goldberg would have at least bobbled it first! Jewball, however, goes to Feit for giving his team real leadership and a sense of unity – or so it seemed. He was in control of the offense and defense from the beginning. He really permeated that “I got you” vibe and I believe his team were motivated by it. Feit Club seemed to buy in this week…and the league is on notice for sure. Besides the precision passing, Feit made some critical defensive plays as well – none bigger than stopping Yaron from tying the game by batting down a nice pass to Mo on a cross in the front of the endzone. So, Feit, Jewball for you. Next League game – one month from tomorrow!

One November in the not too distant future, they will say the weather is unseasonable today – and that will mean it is colder than 50 degrees.Perhaps a scary future, but great for the Jewball present.
I didn’t get to set up a field on Sunday on the grass like in the days of yore. Yaron had already done it by the time I arrived at the scene. And the scene was Jewball in full swing – full sun – and the day heating up. Was mid-60s by 9am. Must have reached 70 at some point during Game 2.
I’ll be honest – I didn’t love the teams this week – I knew there was a potential for blow-outs in the chemistry of it all. My hope, of course, was that the “underdog” team would step up. But perhaps there is something to just divvying up the talent in a more economical way. My bad on Week 4. I will aim to improve that.
Game 1 was at the half when I arrived. I was told Feit was down big and Mighty was having a hell of a day. Maybe 3 scores and a pick. Something like that. The score was 4-1 with Yaron up over Feit. My gameplan of giving Feit the ultimate pass rush seemed to have backfired. Munch wasn’t even on the line. He gave me a despondent look. Singer, always positive and in good spirits. I asked him how it’s going. He flashed his megawatt smile. “Badly.” Okay, so I blew it. Yaron was gonna win. Feit was gonna lose again. Regroup for next week. But, then….the unthinkable happened. First, Feit hits Singer on a stop and go down the left sideline…..a quick score! His second of the day. Only down by 2. Then I see Yaron on the sideline. He had taken himself out with a knee injury. Safe to say if Yaron had stayed in, the scoring would have continued and Feit would have lost, but this is why you play the game. Injuries are as much a part of the game as almost sacks. Gronk took over at QB, but the normally winning same-play caller was not himself on Sunday. An injured throwing arm nagged Gronk all day and despite his quiet intensity and will to win, he could not hold the lead. Plagued with 3 and outs nearly every possession, Feit took advantage and orchestrated consecutive scoring drives to end the game. The final drive was a beauty with Sam making a huge grab for a first down and capped by a PJs TD in the back of the end zone. Great catch from the veteran using his hands for once not to injure someone. And he didn’t even slide. In OT, Gronk could not push another point across, but Feit could. Once again to Singer. Per the box score, Singer scored 4. That’s a Jewball for him. I heard the game had a lot of calls which of course meant a lot of arguing. We addressed that earlier in the week. I’m hoping our players who are suffering from chronic and severe call-itis (and there are only a few) start considering the good of the league over the need to vent and react in the moment. Rule 1: Dont make the call Rule 2 If the call is made, resect it (trash the guy publicly for making the call, but respect it at the same time) Rule 3 Keep the game moving. NOTHING is more annoying than having to listen to two people argue over a call. The guy who made the call is annoying as hell. But you are a very close second for arguing with him about it (yes, I know this applies to me as well).
Speaking of applying to me…your commish has himself a day. Back on the grass, and with his super fly knee brace on for the first time…..wait – mid brag shout out to my boy Big E for coming out – great to see u on the field! – where was I…..oh yeah  Game 2 – Pray against Gronk and once again the team seemed oddly one sided. Especially with Gronk hobbled by whatever kept his pistol of an arm in its holster. Granted, his team dropped some balls, which brought morale down and a general malaise fell over his squad, but Pray and Jordan seemed to be scoring at will. Not sure what defense the opposition had set up, but Jordan was open deep every single possession, scoring on the first 3 possessions of the game. When Gronk finally managed a TD with a strike to Goldberg, Pray came right back and extended the lead again at 4-1. Jordan added another and Pray a P6. Just an all out beat down. Despite some mild protests representing faint gasps of pride….we ran it back with Jordan and Tom switching squads. The final game of the day was better and closer. Jordan put up his 5th of the day – and grabbing a Jewball in the process for the cumulative effort – but Pray wins again, hitting Prime on a cross, who zipped passed a dumbfounded Jordan, and scored the game winner. 2-1 in the nightcap. 

Jewball is not scared to evolve. I still remember when the “kids” (they were 23…I was….28) were pushing me to try these newfangled flag belts. We were a tough league. We prided ourselves on being “rough” touch – pushing down, tripping up – but the flags were what the new guys wanted….so we tried it. I got some heat from the purists – the old school. Flags will ruin the game. People will get hurt (never really understood why it was more dangerous). I can’t do it. The games are worse. All that. Some people left when we made flag permanent – never to return. Good player. Guys who were true Jewballers. This was only a few years after we moved the game from Queens to Woodmere. Another major shift. Did it isolate some people? Yes. But it allowed Jewball to survive – and then thrive. Little things here and there. We have done stats before. We even had a website before. What we have never had before – is set teams and a schedule. In 25 years….never. Until this season. And it certainly emanates from the technology which allows us to do it. Besides just Whatsapp….Do you guys look at the work Bron is putting in on the website? The guy is really making something special for us. If we don’t say it enough – twenty one gun salute to Yaron – for everything he brings. The ideas and the talent to make them happen. There are always people with suggestions – it is rare that someone is willing and able to put in the work to make the suggestion real. So, what was once an idea – and then a meeting – and then some logos and chat fodder – became real. And – outside of a little debate between me and Mighty (and we buried it off chat) – Week 3 in this 2020-2021 season was one of the most memorable, exciting, and intense days in all of regular season Jewball history. To say the experiment worked is a massive understatement. I put it up there with the Chabad games, the Thanksgiving Tournament, and the last few Vets Rooks games as some of the most competitive games we have ever had. I don’t know if you all agree – but I thought the atmosphere was tremendous. There are some kinks to work out, but they are minor and eminently work-out-able. Each game was down to the wire and could have gone either way. Needless to say, I can’t wait until League Week 2 on 11/22.
Game 1 was the Ass Men v. Feit Club. The Ass Men didn’t look much like themselves in their opening game. With Singer, O, and Logan out, and Munch’s back threatening, the Asses picked up veteran Jewballer, Press, as well as new Jewballer Whiskey and MK’s bro, BK. Feit took the ball first and went 3 and out – the Ass Men had an excellent pass rush with Munch managing to be strong throughout the game. Rabin was hopeful that he would feel comfortable being the both team Captain and a premier Ass Man, but things fell apart early and often. He threw a pick on his team’s first two possessions. Feit took his short field and lofted one over the top to Mighty, who was covered step for step by BK, but the length of the football was the only space between Mighty and the back of the endzone. Catch, drag the feet, fly out of bounds. Mighty makes a catch that only he can and the Feit Club goes up 1-0. With the O brothers out (and not replaced ) the Feit Club did a valiant job playing with just 7 and putting their best defensive look out there, but it was really only a matter of time before the Ass Men would score. They simply had too much speed not to. Screens and hand offs, roll outs, and slants eventually got Rabin in the red zone. Double slants by Jordan and MK in the heart of the defense allowed for a little bullet at the 1 yard line, which Jordan caught and hopped over the line, just as his flags were pulled. TD. Tie game. At this point the wheels started to come off for Feit. Despite numerous perfect passes – 3 of them for surefire scores….his receivers let him down. Gronk dropped a ball in the end zone, though it would have been a tough catch for others – a one handed reach over the top…..but he usually makes that catch. And Beast had himself a rough day. His speed got him open numerous times, but the ball was just not his friend on Sunday. Squirting out of his grasp time and again. Mighty, however, was still reliable. Even with the speed of BK and a smothering coverage – Mighty found day light and Feit – as he did all day with his receivers – put the ball right on him.  Mighty and BK got tangled up and both were falling to the ground. Mighty catches the ball while on the ground….gets up untouched and breaks for the end zone. With 30 minutes left in regulation – Feit Club is up 2-1.
The defenses held for the next twenty minutes. BK made sure not to give Mighty an inch. Rabin threw his 3rd pick of the day. But eventually, the Ass Men put a drive together. Oren leaks out from the TE spot to pick a big first down. But, with a 3rd and long – the Ass Men needed to go into their bag of tricks. Because the one thing Rabin could not do all day was throw an effective deep ball. If it was more than 10 yards – it got ugly. MK took control of the huddle and said….This is on me. He called for a pitch and felt confident he could make a good throw. Boy, did he. With the game on the line….MK gets the lateral from Rabin and the O line holds….he has time….Streaking over the middle is Storm and MK throws a strike that Storm grabs at the 15 yard line! The Ass Men have life! A play later Rabin calls Jordan on the slant and after a tap to himself and bobble, Jordan secures the ball and has Feit to beat. Feit wraps him up but is not pulling the flag and with MK causing interference, Jordan keeps his legs moving. At the 4 at the 3 at the 2…..Jordan falls into the end zone. With no time left on the clock…..we have a time game. Each team will get one final possession. Feit picks a bad time to make his least accurate throw of the day. It is essentially a jump ball down the left hash….but he picked the wrong corner to go after. Storm – who made the two biggest plays of the day for the Ass Men – and hence is your Jewball winner – leaps and comes down with the ball for the most timely of picks. Two plays later a screen to BK and that afterburner speed results in an OT TD and the Ass Men beat the Feit Club in Game 1 of the Six Week League. 
Game 2 Recap – an equally riveting game ….Tomorrow…..

Game 2 was Yaron’s 193 against the Birds of Pray. A little history. If you didn’t know…..Yaron is not one of us. Somehow, the guys he brought down have become more Jewballer than him. I’m joking….but the truth is…Yaron had his own Jewball life before joining ours. No doubt we have reaped the benefits of that conversion, but he had his guys and he is loyal to his game. So when the opportunity to get more of his guys involved in Jewball….he welcomed it. On draft night, although he picked up 2 premiere Jewballe talents in Mo and Solo….he said to us…. I’ll get the rest of the team from my prior squad. These are guys we know and have seen. Jimmy, Alan, Tomaz, Stephen, Danny, etc…..truly the nicest and most fun loving guys in the world. They LOVE the game.  And they definitely have the Jewball spirit. Definitely our cousins, if not, our brothers. I am very happy that they are now going to be a semi-regular part of this season. And it was obvious why. At least in terms of atmosphere. Dealing with the rotation is Yaron’s problem….but the rest of us can just behold the sheer numbers that came out for him – and the jubilation they bring. Whether ripping on each other (or our favorite punching bag, Bronny) or cheering for each other. There is a lot to be learned there for our guys. I hope the League Weeks grow over the course of the season in terms of fanfare and hype to match what the 193 bring to the table. 

Problem for Yaron and his team….the game is not won on the sidelines. The game is one between them. And to do that….ya gotta make plays. Doesn’t matter how tall or buff or big you are….you gotta execute. The 193 did not execute well. Time and again, Yaron put the ball on his players….and they did not do their jobs. I don’t just mean bombs or deep routes. I mean they were dropping slants and screens. Was tough to watch. I doubt it will continue, but a rough debut for the 193. Highlights were Jimmy- squat, pretty round and the most unlikely speedy running back you will see. And Danny finally came through on a deep siding route – scoring a big TD in the end but too little too late. Overall, though, Mo was the most reliable WR for Yaron. Making the Jewballers proud. Showing everyone how we do. Good on ya, Mo. Yaron should have kept you in there more. ; )

With the exception of Prime, the Birds are a low key team. Unflashy. Hard working quiet dudes who look to get the job done. Is there a more humble QB in the universe than Pray? His team is a very likable mix. Like I’m a fan. Like I would legit get a Vegh jersey. And Vegh had himself a game as well. After shedding between 15 and 75 pounds over the summer, the guy is faster than ever and is playing with max confidence. Just looking smooth out there. Pray and Vegh hooked up early to set the tone for the Birds. Let the 193 intimidate off the field- on the field, we are gonna show out. 

The first score of the game actually came from another strength of BoP…that is their formidable pass rush of Salem and Legs. Two terminators on the line. Not the big muscle bound rushers you might expect, but they have technique down and are relentless. If Yaron was not hanging his head watching his passes being dropped, he was running for his life. 20 minutes into a scoreless game….Legs brings the heat and tips Yaron’s pass…..Salem plucks it from the sky and P6s his team to a 1-0 lead. Before long it was 2-0 as Prime came back to a ball and showed the 193 that he is someone you cannot try to tackle half-assed. He will stiff arm you in the eyeballs, throat, and ear…So wrap him up! 

Yaron and Danny did make it a close game with a TD after Yaron and Mo moved the ball downfield on a number of runs. With Pray needed to go, he had a chance to go up 3-1 and put on on Goldberg in the endzone. Goldberg had himself a Beast of a day – his mind and body just not in sync. The TD drop was one of many. Like Beast, he will be back. Gronk had been stretching on the sideline….he was ready to come in. Back with his Cronies. What would happen? No one could have predicted one of the best finished to any Jewball game ever. 

Yaron and Danny make that deep connection and the scored is actually tied with 15 minutes left in regulation.

Gronk takes the ball for a drive that may decide the game. I don’t think I can properly describe the various MIND BLOWINGLY AWESOME events that took place on this drive. Let’s begin with a 3rd and long desperation heave to Dobs on the left sideline. Dobs goes up with two hands and somehow the kid from the most trashy borough in the world makes an elegant game saving catch. Two feet in. Move the chains. The crowd went wild! Then we have another desperate moment – just after the incredible de-shirting of Gronk as he scrambled in the backfield- flag belt remaining online!- with the Birds needing serious yards to get within striking distance of the endzone. Gronk scans the field like a pro….and takes a shot….PJs to the rescue! 15 yard completion to the 10 and Birds are back in business! Huge play! PJs had a true hero moment. And then….like a boss…Gronk punches it in with Vegh. Birds up 3-2 with minutes left. 

Yaron gets the ball back looking to even the score and push it into OT. He drives and picks up a first down, but Legs and Salem say unto him: this far and no further. The drive stalls at the 35. The Birds hold on and  pull out a dramatic and elative victory to start their League season. Not sure if it can get better than that, but we will see….

Jewballs go to the BoP line of Salem and Legs. Besides the score they combined for, it was just a joy to watch them motor from wire to wire. Engines revving, pedal pressed all game. And they have a W and a Jewball apiece to show for it.

Week 2 recap

Credit to recap from week 2 to PJs and Salem, as commish was battling post bar mitzvah fatigue. Mazal tov to violence himself. 

Game 1 – a PJs perspective 

Two roads diverged at LHS,
And sorry Two teams could not travel both to victory. And be one winner, long stood Rabin making his first start of new Jewball season And looked down one as far as He could
To where Feit felt confident that his week 1 loss was a fluke. Rabin had Munch, Gronk, and Mighty 3 players that dominate at this game in their colors. Feit challenged with Goldberg, Storm, and Kut. For Feit this game started where is last one ended. First throw to store is ripped up in the air picked off by mighty. Rabin throws a screen to mighty who gets passed 3 defenders to give colors 1-0 lead. Things didn’t get better for Feit who stalled at the goal line a few times. Rabin was on fire. Dipping and dunking. Hits Gronk who jumps over Vegh and Storm for a TD. Then Feit throws a pass off line to Goldberg that’s picked off to make it 4-1 Colors. Feit threw a perfect pass to storm at the end to give Dark their second TD. Munch was in Feit’s face all day and the final score was 6-2. Rabin looked great and Gronk, Mighty, Munch were their Allstar selves

Game 2- from the beast slayer Salem

It was the best of times, it was the worst best of times, as our united Jewballers selflessly allowed a bunch of phony posers take over our turf for an hour and a half, just so that we avoid having to kick their asses. Why you ask? I’ll tell you why, it’s because Jewballers play the end game. We learn, we adapt and we destroy. 

The phony posers rode up on our turf, literally, and tried to distract us from doing the thing only the greats are capable of doing…playing Jewball Football. As Jordan will tell you, this isn’t just a game, this is our lives they were trying to mess with. Well, we rule on grass just as much as we rule on turf…and their day will come.

But enough distractions…Dark didn’t waste any time, Pringle led his team straight into the end zone throwing to a wide open Gronk in the corner of the end zone on their first drive. Colors didn’t like the taste of that, and stormed back with Yaron to Tom pulling out at TE and making some Gronk like spins all the way into the end zone. Dark wasn’t impressed. Or were they?

Legs, on Colors, had enough of trying to get to Pringle, he realized that getting to him was the second line of defense, moving to the second level to wreak havoc at MLB. Well, it worked. Pringle and his crew were stopped and Colors fed THE MVPrime who had a nice rush into the end zone. 2-1 Colors. Dark didn’t like the taste of that either, so they stormed back into the end zone. Tied at 2-2. Yaron and Colors fought right back with countless receptions to Tom and Storm, leading Storm into the end zone. 3-2 Colors. Pringle fired back, with some real elusiveness all game and Dark made it’s way into the end zone again, for a TD. Tied at 3-3. A real competitive game, until Colors ran away with it. Yaron was on fire, beaming some tight spirals to his receivers and Tom, with a nice pass to a wide open Salem to take the lead. 4-3 Colors. Pringle led his team down the field to an open Gronk on fourth down and goal. Gronk made a nice catch but ruled…out of bounds. Controversy ensued but Colors were adamant about the call. Yaron led his team down the field, with Storm making multiple people miss after the catch, confusing the defense and Salem who was trying to block for him. Tom continued his excellent receiving skills and spun his way for another TD. 5-3 Colors. Colors, led by their defense, continued to stop Dark from gaining any moment with Salem rushing solo getting to Pringle 4 times throughout the game. Salem? A pass rusher. Yes, that happened. When Legs made the switch, Salem stepped up. Was it a problem with the o-line? Or was it simply a great pass rush? I’d like to think it’s the latter so Beast and the others can save face. Colors added another TD after MVPrime dropped a laser from Yaron but TD to Salem on the next play. 6-3. Game ended with a pick on Pringle. Game over. All around great effort from Colors, Yaron on fire with 5 TD’s, blocking was A+, the D-line Tom (offensively) and Salem with some great play, Storm with endless receptions, Colors takes the game. Jewball to Salem for a great effort.

It feels like ages ago that we started this season. My failure to write a recap until now reflects the times. Chaos. Pure chaos. A pandemic rages. A country divided. A Bar Mitzvah in jeopardy. Yet, Jewball had a Preseason Game (or 2?) and there was a Captain’s meeting in Rabin’s Sukkah to get the League started – and there was a Week 1 (and since then a Week 2). Week 1 was almost perfect. Almost. The weather? Perfect. The sign ups? Robust. Had to lock people out of both games – Jewball is on fire. As it should be. As it should always be – amen. Klink was back. The O bros were firing on all cylinders. Gronk was saying same play. Vegh was auditioning for a Holocaust play. I mean, this was Week 1 at its best. 
I got to the field with about a half hour to go in Game 1. Y’know….what I can say? Just a beautiful thing to pull up to Week 1 in the sunshine and see LOVE In the form of football. That’s what I see. I am greeted by Storm and his girl – think her name was Jill. A family affair. That’s what Jewball is. We bring the kids, the wives, the intendeds. Me and Storm are stretching out a bit. Throwing it around. In that moment, there is no worries – no troubles – no viruses ravaging the planet. There is only turf and sun and sky, a football, hand eye coordination, and the best energy in the world. I notice that PJS is on the floor…hurt? Kinda hurt? Out for the season? The usual? Love that animal! Oh wait…Singer needs a replacement? Okay…I’ll go in….why not? Oh, he is okay – okay…forget it. Fun while it lasted. 
What’s the score? Feit is down 2. Score is 3-1. Yaron had been on fire. But was I watch the game…..Pray is making stuff happen on offense. Catches a jump ball with one hand over Mighty. Leads to a TD. Then a defensive stop. Then Feit scores again. His crew is now clicking and pumped. Can they steal the game late. Goes into OT. The momentum is all on Feit’s side. Yaron has a 4th and long and if they miss it, for sure Feit will score and end this thing. Yaron heaves one to the sideline….and Singer – ever the opportunist – has the pick lined up – he tips it instead of knocking it down….Mighty dives!!! And makes the catch to keep the game going. A few plays later Prime hauls one in to give his team back the lead! Now Feit is playing for the tie. He goes with what worked last time….a deep bomb to Pray and Pray looks like he can once again beat Mighty over the top – but….Mighty is not gonna be outmuscled twice in the same game. He battles harder this time and makes sure no harm is done. A few plays late Yaron has that goofy grin plastered on his face and Feit is humbled. Yaron beats Feit in Week 1 4-3.
Game 2 was classic Game 2 absurdity for two reasons. My almost perfect from before relates to our soccer playing bizarro world cousins who drove up and basically just sucked the air out of LHS. I’m not gonna talk politics here. We made a deal with them. Hopefully the weather takes care of them so we don’t have issues. Bottom line is – they suck. Kudos to Kut and MK and whoever else absorbed their profound wind and douche baggery for prolonger periods.
On the field…there was a game. Gronk threw three scores to Yaron – all on plays called by Yaron to himself. Yaron gets Jewball for such efforts. If the Game 1 Jewball wasn’t given out – I think it goes to Mighty….at least for what I saw in my few minutes there. Yaron’s first TD was beaut – diving at a full horizontal angle to catch and plunge into the endzone. I know Whiskey picked off Pray on Pray’s first drive. Welcome to Jewball, again. Time has gone by so kal vachomer I don’t recall all the stats or plays…..but it was a mercy killing when we called the game as the soccer pricks started pushing goals onto the field and otherwise swarming around us like so many flies. Gronk beats Pray. Week 1 is behind us and I wrote a recap.

8am:

Colors:
Rabin – QB
Mighty
Gronk
Munch
Sam
Dobs
MK

Dark

Feit – QB
Goldberg
Steveo
PJs
Vegh
Storm
Kut

945

Colors

Yaron – QB
Tom
Whiskey
Storm
Prime
Klink
Salem

Dark

Pray – QB
Gronk
Rabin
Jordan
Beast
Legs
Vegh

8am:

Dark

Feit – QB
Singer
PJs
Kut
Pray
Steveo
MK

Colors

Yaron – QB
Mighty
Sam
Beast
Prime
Daveo
Dobs

945

Dark

Gronk – QB
Yaron
Jordan
Solo
Whiskey
Leon
Vegh

Colors

Pray – QB
Beast
Storm
Prime
Tom
Klink
Salem

Twenty years ago, right about now, I was 22 and had been married for almost four months. Living in Kew Gardens Hills and had discovered that Sundays in the summer meant pick-up basketball at Park Drive East. When winter of 2000 rolled around, as has been recorded in the chronicles of Jewball, a few KGH guys tried to play some football. There were six of us, trying to make a game on a short grass field, puddles iced over causing us to slip and slide – the game was dumb, but I’ll never forget it. Me, Charlie, JK, Mosey, Fine, and Hands. We tried this for a few weeks here and there, but we knew there had to be more out there. JK, was only a year removed from being the MVP of the entire Israel league. He was in the paper every week. I used to walk the streets of Israel with him and kids would stop us. So….if our small band from KGH could latch onto an existing game, we knew would bring value. One day, closer to spring, Grushko and Fine took mercy on us and told us about another game. It was a pretty well established game in Flushing Meadows Park, they said. They had played there before. They seemed to not want to let us in on the secret. They themselves were outsiders so they likely didn’t feel right bringing other people down. Showing us the map to the game was perhaps not their place. But they did tell us. So JK and I drove to Flushing Meadows almost 20 years ago and found the parking lot off 108th and saw the guys playing football, passed the trees and down the hill, with Terrace on the Park looming on the eastern horizon. What struck us was the amount of people playing. Was it 6s…7s?! WOW! How did they organize so many people! And they had cones set up! My God! REAL ORANGE CONES! Where do you even get those??? They had really planned this thing! 
I recognized some people playing. Knew some of their names. Avi Spira was one. Rabin and Brian Sigman were there, but didn’t know them really. Don’t think Kenny was in that week. But, either way….JK and I stood on the sidelines and watched. We did not get in. Don’t think we were welcomed or invited to come back or anything like that. But we kept showing up Sunday mornings (back then….showing up at 9am was the way the game was organized pretty much.) Eventually we got in. Reluctantly on their part at first, but we were consistent and reliable and we found our place. The comfort level grew. I was never a sports guy – and did not play much football before getting married. I learned the game and cared about getting better at it. As people moved on, I started bringing people. Rabin and I talked about it more and more – organizing it together – trying to keep it alive. We moved it the 5Towns and created an email list. The rest is history.
20 years of Jewball in the rearview. Hard to face the reality that I have many many more games behind me than in front of me. But, those contemplations are for another day. Because today is today – now is now. Every Single Season is a Blessing. Every Single Game is a Blessing. Every Single Play is a Blessing. Strapping up your cleats on a Sunday morning is a blessing. Picking out your jersey is a blessing. Stretching on the field before the game in the cold and sunshine is a blessing. Fetching the cones after a game is a blessing. This is where my mind is and must be after 20 years of Jewball. Seize the day. Also – Appreciate the day. 
The days of me hyping Jewball to wake the slumbering Jewballers to gear up for Week 1 is loooong over. We are all revved up and ready to take our talents to the LHS turf. To fill the stat sheets, recaps, and record books. To create new stories and legends. To build upon the legacy of this great game. To be the magical place where twenty years from now someone writing to a bunch of Jewballers remembers when and where, for him, it all began. 
Who wants WEEK 1? (Early, Late, Both)