As I watch my car being buried in snow as this deposition drones on in the background, I am getting more excited to bring the pain on Sunday as we play and celebrate Vets Rooks 2021. At the same time, the crew here wants a Recap. I look back to Week 18…and what do I see? Tom was completely broken. Crushed ribs – could hardly breathe – sleepless nights in agonizing pain. Of course he was IN but only if it was tackle. Eventually he opted out and Rabin and Dobs jumped in late to give us, not only a tackle game, but our first 8 on 8 of the season.
When I got to the field, the messaging was clear: Yaron sucks. Now, was this true? Of course not. It’s a chat meme. At the same time, he was off to a rough start. Some mix of fumbles and picks on his first two possessions – both leading to scores. Pray had a pick 6 to get the party started, I believe. Either way, it was 2-0 with a little more than an hour to go.
Within minutes of my arrival, I was able to observe the bad luck Yaron was having and the momentum that Feit and his crew was riding. Yaron, down but never out, pitched the ball to Prime to get something good going – as is often the case when Prime gets the ball in a tackle game. But Snow Pup Singer is out of his mind when the field is covered in snow. You would think the white stuff was cocaine and he was inhaling it throughout.
He leaps on Prime’s back and yanks his arms apart. The ball is loose! Beast recovers – and things are only getting worse for Yaron. Even when he calls a safe play, things go horribly wrong. Now, let’s look at the other side of the ball. Feit, drops back….gets sacked by Kut – no wait….forces a fumble….this could be a huge gain for Yaron if one of his players jumps on the ball. Maybe can run it back for a score. But, now – Prager picks the ball up and throws a floating 45 yard TD pass! Was the TD called back because the rule was not clear? Yes. But, the contrast between the two fumbles spoke volumes. Feit did eventually convert the turnover into points by having Singer run it up the gut. (FYI – In tackle games, we play one ball in the endzone).
Yaron came out swinging on the next drive – looking to make sure the game would not become a laugher – even if the win seemed out of reach. With a deep ball to MK who leaked out from the wing, his crew was in position to score. Mighty made a great tackle on MK to save a TD, but Yaron did put in the endzone by hooking up with MK again a few plays later. 3-1 Feit.
The momentum really seemed to shift when Storm leaped over Singer to pick a ball meant for Beast. The defensive stat gave Yaron the ball and really short yardage to go to make it a one score game. Unfortunately, Feit and co. put together a goal line stand that likely ended the game for Yaron. Mainly because time was running out for the comeback.
Feit made the comeback even more difficult by refusing to slide on defense any more. The non-score by Yaron turned into a full field drive by Feit capped off by a jump ball TD to Singer, our Jewball winner. 4-2 Feit on top.
With about a half hour to go Yaron put together a Gronk-esque drive consisting of simple calculated plays (outs to Kut who can rumble for big yards with the best of em) and miracle heaves (Rabin making 3 catches on the drive – one of them on 4th and long). The drive ended on with a Kut TD. Down two scores with little time left, the odds were heavily stacked against Yaron. His weak start was going to haunt him.
The nail was hammered into the coffin as Feit drove the entire field and put up a final point.
All Yaron could do was attempt to make it closer. He did so, with a game ending TD to Prime.
I don’t apologize for the lack of passion in this recap. My passion is reserved for Sunday. Beware ye Rooks.
Category: Uncategorized
Wisdom from a Vet
-by Kuti
Status check:
Head, no pain.
Neck: 100% range of motion. Pinched nerve still there.
Shoulders: Left side is fine. Right side has a slight throbbing.
Arms: Left side ok. Right side, tingling pain and numbness from pinched nerve.
Wrists: Full rotation. Good. Continued pins and needles.
Hands. Left side, good. Right side, unable to bend middle and ring finger, otherwise ok.
Chest and ribs: Pain in top right rib, prob bruised, not broken.
Back: Lower back pain. Nothing 5 minutes of stretching can’t work out.
Legs: Throbbing pain in left thigh, (The kind that hurts if you try to use the stairs or stand up.) otherwise good.
Ankles, mostly ok, as long as tendons don’t get caught in the wrong place. (Then it hurts like hell until you can readjust.)
Toes, big nail has turned purple, doesn’t hurt anymore. (Now just need to wait for it to fall off and new one to grow in.)
Safe to get out of bed.
As the great (Future MVP) Singer has stated, once you get things going, the pain kind of goes away. But let’s pause for a moment, you’d think with all the pain that we go through, the injuries and the soreness, we’d just stop. At a certain age you gotta be an adult and make the mature decision to stop putting your body in situations it shouldn’t be in.
We’ve seen what happens to guys that stop playing. They get old. Really really quickly. They have the same pain, and even worse, regret.
Every year there is the famed Vets Rooks game. The question many have is “Am I a Vet yet?” (No one asks, “Can I still be a rook?” except for MK) To be labeled a Jewball Vet is to be accepted into a pantheon of dedicated diehards and derelicts. We know that once you are in the Jewball family, you will never rarely be asked to leave. As this season has shown more than ever, we come together and support each other on and off the field. Once you become a veteran, it means you gave something to the game, something more than a dollar for spray paint. As a matter of fact, I don’t recall money ever being asked for or requested. When something is needed, guys step up and offer. You give your time, energy and pain. You figure out a way to have your wives, girlfriends, families be ok with you leaving every Sunday morning for 2-3 hours. I know for me, I have given up my right to complain. If I get hurt, don’t bring the pain home. Suck it up and take whatever meds you need to.
Being a vet means teaching the younger generation what it takes to survive. You need to teach the younger generation that we are here to have fun, here to play competitive football, here to bring it every single down. But we also need to be able to go back home and carry on our mundane non-jewball aspects of life. We need to go to work tomorrow, we need to be able to help with our kids, we need to be able to function. So, some of you rooks need to learn how to flag grab, you need to learn that if it’s not a snow game, you DO NOT TACKLE. You want to stop a run, make a play. But if you go in with the intent to take a man down, the vets will not be happy. Not only are you hurting a player, you are hurting the game. Next, if you get hurt on a play, you take a minute, collect yourself and get back in there. Now, I’m not saying if you get seriously injured, like a ruptured tendon of dislocated patella. Yes, if that happens, sit the hell down. And stay out until you’re healed up.
Watching the video recaps yesterday, the most common thing heard was Jordan yelling “Go down!” “He’s Down” “Get down!” Why would he keep yelling that? I don’t know if he even realized he was doing it. I‘d like to offer a suggestion. Commish has been playing this game longer than 98% of the guys to have ever played Jewball. He has seen the beginning, the middle, the dark and current. He also sees the future. I’d venture to say that the average age of the VETS this season is significantly higher than ever before. Watching guys play tackle is a beautiful and scary thing. It’s fun to watch but players can get injured at any moment. So when J is standing on the sidelines, he is protecting the past and future of Jewball. He wants, needs to see the vets stay healthy, he needs the rooks to stick around. As he has said many times, you need new, young blood for the game to last.
As I contemplate finally getting out of bed, as painful as it will be, I think to myself. The real question if I am a VET or not is something we should all ask ourselves; “Does Jewball need me or do I need Jewball?
Week 17 – ICEBOWL / SUPERBOWL BBQ / SINGERBOWL recap
But how can I not “tease” the final recap of the season after a Week 17 that saw what we saw on that field? And not just on the field, but in the days leading up to the game and in the hour or so that followed?
In the days leading up to the game, despite reports of Ice Bowls and some “Outs” due to tackle, Singer rounded up some hearty souls – Singer was out of his mind – the chat version of a seizure for a few minutes there – and it was glorious! But the man with the most stickers willed us a game. Again, never underestimate those powerful Jewball vibes. That Jewball transcendence. Did you see it? Did you see the sunshine on Thursday and Friday? Melting that snow – just enough…then more than enough. Did you see the weather reports of rain and freezing temps overnight on Saturday? And where did they go? I don’t know. All I know is – there was no rain. There was nothing. There was Jewball transcendence.
When I did not think there would be a game, I threw out the idea of a meet up by the field for some kind of pre-Super Bowl drinks and wings. Now, we all know the BBQ mythology with Jewball. We say we will do something – like a BBQ – we never do it. That’s the joke. It’s also the reality. But, reality is out the window amid the Dream Season. What is real? What is a dream? As I watched Kut and PJs and Daveo roll vehicle onto a football field! Taking out tables! And BBQs! And bags of wings they prepared for our bothers! And Logan – vaccinated and raring to go with his match light coals! And Steveo with his tent, z’l. And then O and Legs with beers! And E just to bring LOVE! With the snow falling in pristine waves bestowing the atmosphere with a gleaming coat like an alien landscape. Well….my brothers….I have to ask you – in all seriousness – is this a dream or is this reality?? As I sit there in my chair watching an absolutely terrific football game – full of passion, and skill and intensity – a competiveness, a drive, athleticism and spirit – and Yaron is in the game! Last seen writhing on the floor and out for the season, right? And he is competing and smiling and back where he belongs. And BD is there – my warrior contemporary from the Golden Age who has emerged from a long slumber and joined our ranks once again. And O – my blood and my blood – has agreed to flip the wings that Daveo and Kut made and brought on the grill that Kut brought – cooking on the coals that Logan brought – under the tent that Steveo brought – so that I can watch the end of the game – and out of the white wilderness trudges Legs, squinting and beaming with his mustard ski cap askew – and he hands me a beer. I ask if he has a bottle opener and he replies it is a twist off – alas it is…And we watch our brothers play down to the wire. So, again….I ask you – Is that the stuff of a collective dream or has that been our lived-in reality?
The day itself started appropriately enough with Beast showing up at 8am for a 9am game and wondering where everyone was. The good news was, he was able to check the field and confirm that it was playable for our tackle game. Singer had composed the teams the night before and it looked to be an all-out brawl. Yaron returning to lead his squad of BD, Tom, Kut, MK, Logan, and Beast. He would face off against his young protégé who many are calling the season MVP, Pray, calling signals for Prime, Daveo, Singer, Steveo, PJs, and Storm.
I’ve said it before – I’ll say it again now – there is nothing like the primal thrill of the tackle game. And since we only play it in the snow (and it always seems to be snowing during the game) – it is has an added charge of the cold, and wet, and majesty…combined with the rush of the violence and physicality…and – let us not forget – fun. In other words, the players were really amped up for this one. But none more than Singer. He really was like a giant Siberian husky let out of the house for the first snowfall of the season. He was just elated. His glee and energy were off the charts.
Yaron took ball first and relied heavily on his bruiser Tom, who becomes the ultimate weapon in snow games. It’s like he grows a foot and his reach is everywhere. He is nearly impossible to tackle one on one. Although I missed it, the drive ended with a Logan passing TD. I also missed Pray’s first drive, but I did catch the end of it – a roll out strike to Singer in the back of the endzone. An NFL quality play in my estimation. If there was one guarantee on Sunday, it was – the prettier the play, the less likely I had my camera at the ready.
The nice thing about the field conditions on Sunday in terms of playing the game was that, there was just enough snow to justify tackle, but certainly not enough snow to really limit the routes. Guys were moving at good speeds. You could cut and everything. So while a tackle game always allows for exciting runs and screens, the deep game was still available.
I’m going to ask for PJs to fill in some of the gaps here (or at least round up the Top Plays), but I know that Yaron bounced back with a TD to Tom, which was followed up by a game tying score on a 30 yard jump ball to Singer. Singer then put his stamp on the game by picking Yaron from his 5 on a stupefyingly cool leap from the middle line-backer position where Singer jumped the route and while closing in on the QB, snagged the ball out of the air and in a fluid motion tumbled into the endzone. The crowd lost their minds. Yaron was down 3-2 and Singer was off to a phenomenal start.
At this point I was told to start getting the tailgate ready. Off I went. That’s when O showed up and helped me figure out the apparatus that Kut brought, because….y’know….simply bbqing like a pedestrian is beneath him. Don’t worry, I got the last laugh by leaving a burning coal on his table and putting a hole in it.
So what happened while I was prepping? Well, I know Daveo scored for Pray. And Beast for Yaron. I believe Daveo’s score gave Pray a 1 TD lead with 5 minutes left on the clock. But, the ball had popped! Someone else can explain that. It had something to do with Tom. Steveo quickly replaced the ball and Yaron drove the field to keep the game going – and he did score! How?? I don’t know! I was manning the Q. I do know that everyone wanted to keep playing, regardless of the perfectly cooked wings waiting for them. Pray was given a “last-licks” drive to win the game in regulation. And he did so. This I saw. Some runs by Pray and finally a swing out to Prime with Singer lead blocking. A score to win it for MVPray and what I was told was an absolutely epic game. Plus no injuries! Those who played get the memories. The rest of us get to be jealous. It sure looked like a special experience to be out there.
Jewball is to Singer – who owned this dream within a dream from start to finish. From the initial chat-insistence that the game will be played, to the 3 scores – to the lead blocking that sealed the W. He was also flying around making tackles like a fiend. He displayed every single quality that we want a Jewballer to emulate. The positive energy plus the superior talent on the field. Singer, one of the most wholly-earned Jewballs we have ever given out. It comes with our appreciation for you efforts this past week.
And what of the tailgate? Did it come off well? Enough food? How was it? How were PJ’s poppers? How were the wings (and shout to B-sh for releasing his secret recipe for our benefit)? How was it seeing BD finally making eggs? I mean….again…and again….and again….this season has blurred the lines between what is real and what isn’t. Our unity under that tent in the snow just confirmed it. The smell of smoke stuck to my jacket once again confirmed it. Jewballers, we are living a dream. May it continue. Who wants Week 18?
Week 16 Recap
A PJ’s perspective… Another really cold Sunday but as we all arrived for This weeks games, many were very confused. Did Gronk convince, piss off, then bond with Jordan in the games being cancelled due to cold weather? Did Gronk successfully get himself out of the games? Would Gronk even play in these games? Even though he said “OUT”. Was Yaron really coming back? Well I’ll let the story begin.
Yaron made very compatible teams this week. Very impressed with his matchups. Game 1 featured Feit in colors with his FC teammates Mighty and Beast along with Prime, Tabak, Big O, and Sam versus The “enigma” Gronk and his top Cronie Goldberg, along with front runners for MVP in Pray and Storm, Mr. Jewball himself Kut, Held, and PJ’s. Game time temps were 18 degrees but no wind and no sun.
Feits club got the ball first and they were ready to roll. Feit hits Beast and Mighty for a couple of nice gains. But an errant throw down the field is picked off by Pray. Gronk thinks he’s ready to roll but he throws a pick as well right back to Feit. Was this going to be another defensive grind of a game?? Prime says get me the ball and Feit throws it over Held for a beautiful first score. Gronk gets the ball back and he wants to spread the rock around. His best attribute as QB is that he wants everyone to touch the ball. And so he drives his Team down the field, hits PJ’s on a perfect over the shoulder pass in the end zone for a 30 yard TD and we are all tied up. Couple of stalled drives by both teams and then offense really comes on. Feit hits Tabak on a 50 yard run a catch only for Tabak to run out of bounds. Feit then goes on a QB run for a 20 yard TD and regains the lead. Gronk drives it back down the field and hits Kut on a nice 10 yard TD screen to tie it back up. Feit drives it back and hits Mighty for a TD. Gronk responds and hits Pray on 90 yard catch and run. We are all tied at 3. Feit is not deterred and drives them down the field once again, this time he finds beast who breaks some tackles and ends up in the end zone. Up 4-3 with 20 minutes remaining Gronk goes in hurry up mode. Drives the team down the field and somehow hits Goldberg between two defenders for a TD. Goldberg lost his Fanny pack but held on to the ball. Feit wants to win and beat Gronk his teammate on FC. No QB controversy on the front runners for the chip. But he forgets that a certain Bird is watching and waiting. Pray picks off Feit. Gronk then finds Pray for the game winning TD. Game over 5-4 Gronk.
Jewball game 1 should go to Pray. 2 TD’s receptions and 2 picks. Gronk is honorable mention who played a very solid QB, threw 5 TD’s and 1 pick.
Game 2 this week almost didn’t happen, signups were lacking but Yaron got his main squeeze and fellow 193 Compadre in Solo to sign up. Then he got Danny in as well. Ivry signed up and we were all good to go!!
Yaron has been praying for his return to happen ever since he got hurt. To be serious for a second. Yaron is not just an amazing QB but he has brought great talent to Jewball, he made us website. He also Keeps track of stats for Mighty, and brought the controversial league into Jewball life. He’s done a lot for Jewball. Outside of Jordan our Commish there aren’t too many dedicated people like Yaron. I personally was happy to see him back. Which is why I offered to play D. We all know my talent level isn’t anywhere near Yaron but we need him healthy for himself and for better football. An argument can be made that he shouldn’t of played this week and he should keep resting, but that was his call.
Yaron lined up with Gronk, Beast, Solo, Ivry, Salem, and Danny. PJ’s was Defense for Yaron. Vs Pray with Some of his birds, Prime and Goldberg along with Ross, Storm, Kut, and Whisky. Yaron started the game with some handoffs and short throws but this led to stalled drive. Pray was using his talent and moving down the field. Pray fakes a run and finds a wide open Whisky who catches and runs for a 40 yard TD. 1-0 Pray. Yaron knows he got talent. So he looks towards Gronk who tries to one hand a throw that lands in his teammates Ivrys hands and he’s off to the races and we are tied up. Ivry picks off Pray on the next drive inside the 20. Yaron showing some rust stalls out at 3 yard line. Pray utilizes Ross and finds him deep and he’s off to the races and takes the lead back 2-1. Yaron answers driving his team down the field. Hits Ivry on a beautiful 30 yard sideline bullet to Ivry and then Finds Salem who makes a diving catch keeping the ball off the ground at the 10 yard line. Yaron bullets it in Gronk. We are tied back at 2. Pray isn’t deterred. The man defense set up by Yaron’s team is just no match. Pray decides to take matters into his own hands and out runs everyone for a long TD run. Yaron answers though with strike to Beast. We are all tied. You know it’s strange that Storms name hasn’t been mentioned much today well he missed a few interception opportunities but he was laser focused on offense. Pray finally finds Storm in the end zone to take a 4-3 lead. Yaron stalls out. Kuts and Whiskeys pressure finally does some damage. Pray wants to end this game at 11:05 and so he drives his team down the field and hits a wide open Goldberg for a 50 yard catch and touchdown. Yaron isn’t ready to go down like that. He gets the ball and is ready to drive. Unfortunately Whisky gets hurt taking down Beast on first down catch. PJ’s come in. Yaron is forced into a 4th and long and is sacked by PJ’s to end the game. Tough loss for Yaron but it’s just great to see that gunslinger out there.
Game 2 Jewball should go to Pray as well. 4 TD passes and rushing TD as well. Kut had 2 sacks as an honorable mention.
Week 15 Recap
A PJ’s perspective recap: Jewball has been a staple in my life since I started back in 2007. B-sh invited me to play football little did I know what this 14 year relationship would be. I took a 5 year hiatus in 2013 that I still regret it… but I was starting a new job and had a new kid and I was in so much pain daily. I thought those were my priorities, boy did i forget what Jewball means to so much of us. Seeing what Singer and Steve- O chatted yesterday, each Sunday means so much for all of us. I know that last year when I had a death in my family playing let me clear my mind. And when I had another family albeit distant relatives death this past week from COVID, getting out there and playing in these games is just so cathartic. Love this Jewball family… Ok personal sharing time is over….
This week signups were low with some Jewballers getting tans in Florida, celebrating Simcha’s, and some just recovering from injuries. Gronk backed out to recover and we were left without a QB for game 2. Goldberg steps up by helping game 1 happen with his plus 1 and then saves game 2 when Rami his plus 1 steps in and makes a competitive game 2 at QB…..More on that later.
Game 1 has the matchup of the season. Feels like Aikman vs Young weekly. Usually a close matchup each time. But it’s fun to play when these two gun slingers are on. Pray lined up with Storm, Beast (on time), Tabak, Steve-O, whisky, and Sting vs Feit’s not so much Feit club, but it features Singer, Prime, Goldberg, Rami, Vegh, and PJ’s.
The real feel at game time was probably zero degree’s. I offer everyone breakfast on me not to play but these Jewballers care more about football then hypothermia. Oh F—k you guys for your tans and hot weather. You should all need to sit out a week for that crap. Ok back to the game…. it looks like a classic Defensive battle early. Singers blitzing game plan against Pray early is working. Rami picks up a sack and gets good pressure between him and singer. Sting gets hurt but stays in the game. Feit’s team is just not getting any real yards or completions. Bunch of 3 and outs. But Feit’s defense gets a big picks on Pray by Rami and Prime in the end zone. Nothing seems to be working for either team. Pray throws another ball on the run on Rami has the pick and a return but knocks the ball into the air into the arms of storm who runs it’s all the way and now it’s 1-0 Pray. Feit’s team is still struggling on offense to find rhythm. Beast and whisky are getting in and getting sacks they total 5 on the morning combined. Pray finds Tabak on a nice catch and run to take 2-0 lead. Feit’s team couldn’t grab flags. They also dropped 3 picks, Goldberg, Vegh, and Rami. It’s now 9 am. Singer is trying to motivate his QB and team. Feit drives the team down the field with good short passes to singer and Goldberg. Then he heaves a 30 yard pass to the back of the end zone and hits Prime with 3 balls in for a TD. Next Pray drive singer with a pick 6 and we are all tied at 2. Prager sees the clock and knows that he needs to use up the clock. They are running every play now. Pray to the right or the left and he’s getting first downs. Feit’s team struggling with getting flags and Prays team are blocking. Pray hits Beast on a screen and he goes all the way to take the lead. Feit’s team isn’t able to get anything going and Singer goes down with a knee injury. Feits team is deflated. End of another failed drive. Enters Faux PJ’s who happens to be Prays brother in law. You know when he came in for Singer that only great things would happen and then Pray gets the ball again and runs it’s for a 90 yard TD game over. Pray 4- Feit 2.
Game 2: with Sting being Stung he has to leave and game 2 looks like it will be 6’s. Someone needs to come. So we go to the chat and no one responds. I decided to hang out and play a few drives to allow them to have 7’s for a short time. I ended up leaving for 10-15
Minutes and then returned so no one had to sit. Shalom Bayis rule #1 if you’re going to lie, have every story planned out so it’s believable and you don’t get caught. And check that Primes couch has room. Back to the game… we have Pray coming off a win ready to roll with Storm, Ivry, Vegh, Salem, Faux PJ’s (Josh, Prays brother in law), and PJ’s vs Rami ( who’s a very solid backup QB and overall player, Goldberg did good!), Prime, Goldberg, Tabak, Beast, Whisky, and Jack “freakin” Ross.
This game starts off slow. Both teams trying to find themselves. Rami gets sacked tackled by the real PJ’s on his second drive. Pray is finally able to get going by shitting Storm to take a 1-0 lead. Pray would strike again hitting Ivry and taking a 2-0 lead. Rami didn’t want to go down like this so he abandons his conservative play calling and fakes a run right to find a wide open Jack Ross in the middle of the field who takes to to the house and out runs even Pray for a 70 yard TD. And now we have a game. Pray says to Rami. I’ll use my best target again. Ivry lined up as TE, catches a screen pass and avoids Goldberg and the rest of the team to take a 3-1. Prays is looking like he’s going to have a 2 win day. Prime says no my Birds of Prey teammate, I want this one. Rami hits Prime on a short pass and he avoids 3 tackles and takes it the house to make it 3-2. Pray is stalling though. And Rami gets the ball back with 10 minutes to go. And drives down the field gets to the red zone. But Pray’s Defense is getting pressure and making plays. Forces Rami into a 4th and goal at the 11. Rami looks for one man on this field who has height and hands, throws up a ball in the end zone and of course Ross makes an amazing jumping catch to tie the game. Pray gets the ball back to take the lead and gets a good drive going but is backed up into a 4th a long at the 30 and can’t complete it. Tie ball game.
Game 1- Jewball should go to Beast although he did drop a wide open TD. But he had 2.5 sacks and the go ahead TD.
Game 2- would’ve gone to Ivry or Ross but ended in a tie.
Signup will be when J says so…. Great week of fun everyone. Sting and Singer I hope you heal quickly. We might get Snow next Sunday…
A week of Mazal Tovs!
In the past week (or 2) several in our Jewball Fam have had wonderful simchas that need to me shared!
Mazal tov to DOBS on his wedding!
Mazal tov to MAOR on his wedding! (not to each other)
And a Mazal tov to Sam #21 the real Primetime on the birth of his son Yehuda Aryeh!
Keep growing jewball fam and making us proud!
Week 14 Recap
On this snowy morning, hard not to think football – and specifically Yaron getting bodied by Tom like a punk ass ho.
But I digress-
Short day for me and short recap. I’m heading down south for a week. Driving, so will make the requisite football stops along the way. Any Panthers or Jaguars fans…hit me up.
I did catch the end of Week 14 Game 1. Y’know there is a part of me that wants to write a whole recap about Pray. The guy is having an MVP season, and I watch him and just think – damn, he could be so much better. Now, that isn’t really fair. I’ve never been as good as him, plus I’m hobbled in the present. So who am I to criticize? But, then I think…I’m not being critical. I’m not even just saying. I’m actually a fan. And I want Jewball to be its best. So when I watch him lose to Gronk in Game 1 by a score of 3-1 and some people are telling me that the teams aren’t fair or whatever….first of all – the teams were fair – yer a bitch. And also….eveyone needs to step up their game. Pray, you say hike….take 5 steps back and start running – mostly to your right. Does it work for you? Sure, the numbers say it does. You win a lot. You produce a lot. But, I guess what I am saying is….you should lose even less! Start thinking – 2 steps back, forget the pressure for 2 seconds….and see….just see everything that is before you. Don’t see the rush. See ALL your options. See that your guys are open all over the place – and unleash that cannon. I promise, good things will happen. A lot more easy buckets. You are just working too damn hard. And I saw while I was there…..Singer gameplanned for you. And he got a Jewball out of it. The key is to neutralize the Singers and Munches of the world by getting rid of that ball in 2 seconds.
Speaking of working too hard, no one makes it easier for himself than Gronk. His understanding of the mechanics of being a QB – the simplification of the data in his mind – jumps off the page when you watch him play. Probably why he is always smirking. He almost doesn’t understand why the opposing QB wouldn’t do exactly what he is doing. Hike, step back, get rid of the ball.
Anyway, I did see the whole Game 2 and it was a good one. Back and forth until the end. The first five possessions were for scores. Some sloppiness on the defense. Whether it be guys sneaking behind the safety (Ross?) or running for extra yards after the catch (Daveo?) It was a lot of Gronk and Storm in the early going for stats. I recall a quintessential Goldberg stiff-arm fest that was just spectacular. Prime was working it with Pray. Honestly, my memory of the details at some point gets hazy. Was really cold and I started talking to Ivry about how we are basically NFL players. Anyway, Gronk was up 5-3 and looking unstoppable on offense. I though the game was over. Think all of a sudden the entire Dark Team decided they didn’t want to lose. Salem and Beast poured on the sacks (2 apiece) and Pray found running lanes. Honestly, in a flash it was 6-5 Dark. The game ended on a Goldberg P6 from Dark’s 8, to make it seem like the game was closer than it was. Prime gets the Jewball for the offensive outburst and the W.
Who wants Week 15?
Week 13 Recap
A little more than three years ago, I wrote a woe-is-me recap following a Turkey Bowl during an otherwise lost season. A season where Jewball may have hit its lowest point – having joined Croton – just so that games would be played and the name Jewball would survive. I missed the end of that season with a torn tendon in my finger (courtesy of Goldberg) but….was no great loss. Jewball was no great prize. Fixed the tendon, rehabbed it back….and the past few seasons have been such a miracle – icing on the cake of my career playing this game. Thank you all for giving me a way to get injured that feels entirely worth it as well as the motivation to put in the work and come back better than ever. I have a birthday this Saturday. I will be 43 and ready to kick ass when I come back – whether it be in a month or next season. Long live Jewball.
Week 13 was a League Week and that meant the usual increased intensity going in. We had the heavyweight battle at 8am with Birds taking on Feit Club, followed by a contest between two reeling squads, 193 and Ass Men.
I’ll be honest – it was cold at Lawrence High School at 8am, but I expected a bigger crowd for this bout. I was there….eventually with Sting, but that was about it. Pray against Feit in a game with stakes! Come on, Jewballers! League action at its finest.
But…y’know what? Maybe the fans stayed away because they knew what I did not. That the action would be limited. Sure, there were productive drives – but most of them stalled. And I’m not even sure if I could give credit to either defense. I think the theme for the day was missed opportunities. QBs and receivers just missing their marks. Open targets overthrown. Open receivers not targeted. No need to create the tension where there was none. For the majority of the game, it was all Feit Club. Feit to Mighty for two TDs and two more almost TDs (just out of the reach of Mighty going full blazing speed). Kut and Gronk being super disruptive and sacking Pray off nonstop. Daveo with a timely pick. Even without a game changer in Beast, the Feit Club came to play and cemented themselves as the top team in Jewball 2020-2021. That is not to say that the Birds couldn’t have won this game. Vegh, even with his TD…which only came off a Mighty tip – did struggle a bit early on in making much needed clutch grabs for his Birds. It was Prime being the most reliable and professional of the Birds’ receivers – showing the kind of game needed to get the Birds to the promised land. Goldberg matched that intensity once in the game and it was on that scoring drive – a joyful, gritty display of stiff arming. Ken Yirbu. In the end, it came down to a final drive. Pray and his Birds with an opportunity to tie. Pray, as he did most of the game, earned some very hard fought first downs with his legs (although in my opinion – his success will be measured on him becoming better at getting rid of the ball quicker, throwing from the pocket, and finding that opening man in his first progression) – and with the clock wound down – and a 4th and goal from the 20 he threw a prayer to his tallest receiver. Actually, a catchable ball for Goldberg – but no catch made. Birds lose and I got lucky since I didn’t need to argue about overtime…..or so I thought. Bottom line: Birds and Feit club basically played to a draw, but Feit Club wins because –generally – they wanted it more. Jewballs to Kut and Gronk for the 8 sacks. Keeping Pray from running free, making up for the last minute loss of Beast, and showing what “wanting it more” looks like. Please send a charity each to the main chat. Let’s change the world, Jewballers.
So, let’s address the rules for a second. I respect that clarity is needed. I ask you to respect that there may not be a clear rule – essentially because there has never been. Yes, all Vets are correct – we play last licks. I’m not going to argue that. But let’s also acknowledge that other factors have come into play. The time. Who has to leave. Of course the score (big difference of whether we are playing for the tie or the win). I will begin with the most obvious point: We have never had League Games before. So, with all due respect the Vets, to compare a League Game – which by its nature is different – to the prior 20 or so years of Jewball is already a flawed pursuit. That is first consideration. So what is different between League and non-League. I would look at 2 things 1.) Schedule and 2.) Critical outcome. Two things that matter less in average Week. Meaning, with Leagues….we have 14 people waiting to get on and start on time and because there are seeds, we would like a winner and a loser (of course that didn’t happen in Game 2 for other reasons).
So, without explaining further why I said – if Pray scored, we would go to a tie breaker OT from the 25 (with Feit Club getting ball last) – I am merely here to address and enlighten that additional considerations were at play above and beyond what Jewball “usually” does.
To Game 2. First off, always great seeing Flash return to our game. He brings an energy, warmth, and star quality that truly lights up a field. When he ran around to everyone on the Ass Men to say whats up before the game, Is said, “See…this guy is just too nice.” He looked at me and replied, “Yeah, but I’m also a killer.” Well, it’s true – he is, but so is Munch.
The headline story with Game 2 was Malik and Rabin missing their guys all over the place – occasionally making a big play – and just doing enough to tie. The real story was Solo and Munch – absolutely terrorizing their opposing QBs and collapsing on screens. Munch, with fury and violence. Solo, with violence and fury. Malik, usually a major threat to break off a huge run at any moment was completely kept in check by Munch, MK, and Singer. Rabin was kept in check by putting just a bit too much on the ball. On a play that may have sealed the win for the Ass Men, a flea flicker to Storm set up a pass to Jordan on a 3rd and long, but the pass was over thrown and Jordan tore a muscle leaping for it. A play later, Jordan blew his coverage and Malik found Danny deeeeeep for a 193 score. Afew plays later, Solo tackled Rabin and hobbled the Ass Men QB. With the clock having run, with the injuries and the ineptitude – the two teams had enough – calling it a draw. Congrats to 193 for the non-loss. What to build on.
Who wants Week 14?
Week 12 Recap
Week 12 marked the end of the flurry of games we call Bowl season. A series of 6 games within about 10 days. It’s always great when we can pull off all 6, and this year – once again – we did.
Last Sunday was a cold one but not windy and the sun peaked through the clouds once in a while. The kind of January weather you cannot complain about as a Jewballer.
There was a threat of rain and it was decided to have the 8am game start on time and Game 2 to start immediately thereafter. It kind of happened. The early game did not start on time because someone was a bit late. Guys, we need to enforce punctuality for Game 1, especially for the guys who claim they want both. Anyway, the game started on time-ish and it was once again, the best contest Jewball has going right now. Feit v. Pray. When I arrived it was 2-1 Feit and I was told Beast was in line for a Jewball. Had a score already and a pick. He later would score again. And add a game ending pick. Unfortunately, there are no Jewballs for ties….and this one was another tie. I don’t ever remember our game having this many weeks with tie scores at the buzzer. I don’t remember how Pray tied up the game entirely but I saw Singer make a wicked good grab running up the gut of the defense and gathering in a floating ball from Pray with one arm while fighting people off in the endzone. As pretty a TD as u will see. No stats were had for the rat and he doesn’t get his precious W. Overall….a very good game with an unsatisfying conclusion. On to Game 2 which did see some rain but nothing that made it ever remotely worth canceling.
Rabin in Colora was the starter against Gronk. In short, Rabin was at his worst and Gronk was at his best. Gronk had the swagger of Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes combined. Just totally confident and in control. Running his offense commandingly. He threw a TD to every single one of his recievers….2 to Tom. On the other side, Rabin and Co were struggling. To move the ball. And really to defend. Pulling flags was a disaster. Every run was successful, with the first and second defender encountered coming up empty handed. Colors found themselves in a hole and just staring at their hands wondering why the flags weren’t popping. The rain may have played a factor, but no excuses.
Speaking of no excuses, a QB who can’t move the ball for his team is a problem. So Pray took over for Colors. For a while the dynamic of the game did change. In a span of twenty minutes, Pray threw a TD to Storm, had two P6s and rushed for a score. Colors got within one of Dark. But Gronk just effortlessly piled on. Salem for 50 yards and then a TD on the cross. A shuffle pass to Tom. Pray added a TD with Jordan late but Gronk put up 7 scores and it was too much to overcome. Gronk with the Jewball for leading his team to an impressive offensive explosion. Leagues a comin…..
NEW YEARS 2021 BOWL
No recaps for bowl games, but this one was a classic for the ages. Team Feit defeated Team Prager 9-8 in quadruple OT.
HAPPY NEW YEARS EVERYONE!!
