After the excitement from Vets Rooks 26, there was still more football to be played. We had two weeks left on the schedule Week 20 and 21 and three league games to fit in.

In the early game it was colors of yaron, bz, goldberg, kut, stats, rook, and vegh against dark of pray, prime, tbd, kagan, berk, bert, and zada. Colors took the ball first and in just a few plays it was 1-0 colors as yaron hit kut in the back of the endzone. Dark would respond with a really impressive drive of mixed runs and prime screens to get into the red zone but on 4th and goal from the 13, Goldberg stuck his long arms out but instead of a flag guard he wound up with an int and colors had the ball back. Immediately right back down the field they went. Three plays later it was stats from 10 yards out, 2-0 colors. Dark moved methodically down the field again and after a big catch and run by zada it was a flip from pray to berk to make it 2-1. But Colors offense was relentless and after a few dump offs to vegh and kut, it was yaron down the sideline taking it himself from 45 yards out. 3-1 colors. Dark would again respond but they were constantly playing from behind, this time after a missed sack by bz and kut, it was a flip to Kagan who followed his blo(a)cks (aka prime) en route to a 25 yard td. 3-2 now. Yaron though was feeling himself and cool yaron was just about peaking through now that the snow was gone- a long ball to the rook pushed colors back up by 2. 4-2. Dark answered back with another drive mixed with runs and short throws to zada and berk. a screen pass to prime from five out made it 4-3. Dark needed a stop but none was coming, cool yaron was back and he would score once again. This time to vegh to all but end the game. Dark would go on another great drive after a 60 yard bomb from pray to berk who somehow got caught at the 15 by stats, but a redzone stall would keep the game a two possession one. Dark finally got their first stop of the game on a zada int, but it was too little too late. it was 930 and the game was effectively over. Dark would score on a nifty delayed out by bert to end the game 5-4 colors. Easy jewball to yaron in this one for the 4 tds and rushing td. Cool yaron was back….. or was he.

In game 2 it was BLOP v. Stogies in what essentially was a playoff game. The Stogies win and they were locked into a playoff spot. A blop win by at least ten (yes PD head to head for Logan) would guarantee them a playoff spot. Less than 10, and they’d need to win the next game also. The game started out pretty docile and everyone was on their best behavior. The yelling or arguing was to a minimum but the tension was real. Both teams in a fight for their lives. Would either of these teams smoke their last chance for an opportunity at the chip. The real story of the day was that blop was short handed and missing the Invader. How that would affect their team no one was sure. But what they couldn’t replace in zinn’s talent, they replaced in leadership, fiereiness, and just an all out commitment to football and that was Jordan. The big J was in town again and was suiting up for his old blop team. Yes, this wasn’t the same team he was a part of last year. In fact, he was playing against his old QB in yaron. But it was the jordan-prime blop connection and Jordan wanted to make sure that blop went out with a win. The first drive of the game ended in stogies turning it over on downs and it was blops ball to try and take an early lead. A few short passes to Ernie and prime and they were in business. On 3rd and goal from the 12, football dachs (yes he showed up today) delivered a dart to Jordan by the front pylon. The place erupted. Not because the ball was caught, as it was determined that he did not have both feet down, but because everyone was sure they had seen exactly what had happened. The line judges conferred and no catch was the call. One play later though it was dachs to landy 6-0 blop. stogies would start their own drive and moved the ball methodically down the field for a yaron to gronk td to tie the game up. Unfortunately for stogies that was the end of their scoring for a while. Now as mentioned before stogies just needed to play defense, a loss wouldn’t be nearly as devastating for them as a blowout. But as mentioned before as well, football dachs came to play and used every weapon at his disposal. The next td was of the rushing variety 13-6 blop. stogies would try to respond but legs and justin brought every ounce of pressure they could muster. Legs finished the day with 4 sacks and Justin with two batted passes and the stogie offense was on the brink. Meanwhile, dachs put up two more scores one to prime and the other to Ernie and the game was 27-6. Stogies would need to put something together and fast. But between the pressure and secondary coverage of blop (landy with 2 ints). All they could get was a last drive td to stats to make it 27-12. The stogie season was extinguished. what started out as a 2-0 powerhouse dropped the final 4 games to finish 2-4. Huge shoutout to Stella for captaining up this year and just genuinely understanding that leagues are for the good of jewball and not the other way around. For Blop, they now entered the playoff race and anything is possible especially once zinn is back in the picture. A lot of worthy jewball candidates for this one — football dachs balled out with 3 tds and a rushing td, prime made sure his team would not quit despite starting 0-3, legs finished the day with 4 sacks and an almost td but didn’t want to lose yards, and landy had a td and 2 ints on defense. But it is this recap writer’s belief that none of that would be possible without Mr. J(ewball) himself. Maybe Blop still wins this game without jordan. it’s certainly possible. But I for one do not believe that the blop performance is nearly as dominant if not for jordan. Jordan was the heart and soul of blop on sunday and we were lucky enough to get two jewball sundays with jordan back in town. Jordan, a jewball for you for rallying the troops as you always do and picking up that W. Some stats don’t show up on a spreadsheet and are not quantifiable. Similar to what you mean and do for jewball. It’s not something that can be put into numbers.

The next day jewball went south for the Where’s waldo wedding– join the vn chat for that recap 🙂

Even with AI, the internet, and the myriad of research tools at our fingertips, we still live in a world of unknowns. Everyone likes to speculate; predict outcomes, even bet on them. But no one knows. Human beings are still autonomous and spontaneous and subject to volatile shifts in mood, perspective, and objectives. Our whims change by the day – sometimes by the hour. So when I asked that Pray be in charge of Jewball – and – in many ways – left Jewball (my precious – I’m Gollum) in all of your hands…I speculated that things would carry on smoothly, I predicted that Pray would be the right leader to keep the Jewball flame burning bright and – in our own way – burning eternal.
But you never know.
You don’t need me to tell you that Jewball is standing strong. That it’s on fire in all the best ways. Did we take hits this season? For sure. The weather kept us from the one thing we need most – football games. Many key players got hurt. Some of our favorite Jewball characters checked out. Leagues gonna League. It happens. JBFL regardless and for real. I saw all this happening from a distance. Not once was I worried. I could tell we were thriving. TBI has never been better. Not a knock on PJs. He would have been part of this had he chose to. It just gets better every year…that’s called experience and technological advancements. Pray was so the right man for the job. Clear as day. We live in an age of Jewball iluys and phenoms and prodigies. Everyone seems to come in young and fresh and avid with so much polish and wisdom. It’s one reincarnated Jewball soul after another. There is no other way to explain some of these Rooks. Pray – now a seasoned Jewball Vet – is in YEAR 1 of this job! And he’s such a pro. Imagine in 10 years! Which sort of brings me to Sunday and the reason I am even writing.
Pray did ask me to write, but after Sunday’s game…I really wanted to. My heart was spilling over with so much awe and appreciation for the world we built. My mind was supersaturated with expressions that I had to share like an incandescent billboard. Starting with a feeling of pure primal gratitude – that at 48 I’m still playing the game. That alone. A miracle in its own way. And like I said in the last recap I wrote – I believe (and in many ways know) that I have merited to stay healthy because I have merited to be playing. It’s a circle of kinetic spiritual energy that continues to pulsate. God runs the world. God runs nature. For now, God wants me to play football and be one of you. Otherwise, it doesn’t really make sense. Next, to know that the field is where we reunite. It’s our makom mikdash (a sanctified place – sanctified by us, but also inherently). We commit to a pilgrimage every Sunday morning. The field is where we gather and the game is the ritual. Not a cult, but there is something devotional about it all. Especially the ingathering bit. I ran into some Jewballers over my first Shabbos in town. Mostly vets who hadn’t played in a while. Marino, Sig, Hackel, Fox (Star’s dad). Of course we talk football and Jewball, because that’s what it means to be a Vet. It’s part of you. And that part longs so much for the game. Which is exactly why you never quit or hang ‘em up or retire. The game must be violently ripped from you. You don’t relinquish it by choice. I didn’t want to see the current roster of active Jewballers in shul. Or on Central Avenue. Or at a kiddush. The field is the sanctified ground. That is where we gather. That is where we reunite.
And so it was. Yaron picked me up on Sunday morning and off we went to play in the annual rite of passage we call Vets Rooks. Here is where I would maybe write about how meaningful Vets Rooks is. But I’ve set the stage enough. Our Rooks are so locked in and committed and get it on such a deep level, my rallying cry polemic would ring redundant. Vets Rooks matters because being a Vet matters. Being a Rook matters. I used to need to explain why. Unnecessary in 2026. You see what we are. You all know why.
The pre-game drama – as there always has to be – was do the Seniors have a team? Jordan was going to be in for the game having been inspired by Singer and flying in for VR, but the big story was the new additions of Tabak and Gronk. Jewballers of 10 years now! Congratulations! An incredible milestone. With G-d’s help, by everyone! The drama involved Gronk being out, TBD being out, MK being out, Steve-O being out, and Mighty threatening to be out if his kid’s hockey game was on. After driving the Commish (and Juniors’ Co-Captain) crazy, it was decided that Mighty was in, Rabin (the most Vet of all Vets) was going to QB, and the Seniors would fight with the personnel they had (Rabin, Mighty, Daveo, O, Kut, PJs, Jordan, and Tabak).
They would face off against their fellow Vet Juniors team lead by Pray and Yaron and comprised of a savvy battle tested crew of Logan, Legs, Prime, Storm, Goldberg, Vegh, and Zada.
On paper, many would say the Seniors had no shot. Rabin hadn’t won a big game as starting QB since VR 5 years earlier (crazy how time flies). PJs hadn’t played a game all season. Technically, neither had Jordan. Kut was a little banged up as he always is this time of year after laying his body on the line for Jewball season after season. But Daveo got that motor. O was in the best shape he’d been in for many years. Stella just keeps getting better and was highly motivated in his Seniors debut. And Mighty is the reigning MVP having another MVP caliber season. Any given Sunday.
First of all, an ode to PJs. Few hear the VR call like PJs. Klink hears it, but, alas reality. Singer hears it, but, alas caution. PJs hears it and it is irresistible. Reality is a construct. Caution is thrown to the wind. To paraphrase the patriot Nathan Hale quoted as he marched to execution, “My only regret is that I have but one body to give to Jewball.” PJs has already given his body to Jewball. He is credited with ushering in the Renaissance, just when the Golden Age was fading to black. He took a long hiatus due to family and learning and lack of a game-appropriate wardrobe. But he came back. Participated in the Revolution. Was a star of the Revolution. Pioneered so many aspects of Jewball that are still enjoyed today, including producing and hosting the first bunch of seasons of TBI. But damn does that kid play reckless. So. Many. Collisions. None more monumental and terrifying as the one between he and Prime on Red Sunday. Knocked unconscious. Ambulance to the field. Real damage. Real consequences. The need for real healing. He took the time, played occasionally, but became more of a figurehead in Jewball. Few remember well his playing days. Despite these risks, it was VR Sunday, and PJs heard the call – like many hear the call – but, unlike many – PJs answered it. He came out and battled and showed everyone what it means to be a Vet. Of course Yaron promptly threw a bullet pass directly at his head from point blank range. PJs, you are an inspiration. Some say what you are doing is dangerous. What about your mental health? I mean, that’s valid. But….Jewball is also needed for our mental health. It’s a tough question with no easy answer. I just know you inspire me. Thank you for being my Jewball brother for so long.
The game started with a 3 and out for the Juniors. A good question to ask was – with Cool Yaron dead – did it make sense for Pray to start? The Commish was having another dominant season. But there is that respect thing and Uncool Yaron had been playing pretty well. The problem being that the Seniors had beaten the Juniors the prior year because Yaron was way off. This game started with Yaron being on at QB, but Pray being unable to get a handle on his passes. Three drops in the first few Junior possessions. The Seniors were not doing much better. Unlike in last year’s VR Finals, Rabin was able to grip the ball and throw it, but – even with Solo canceling last minute – Legs and Zada were fierce and pressuring him (3 sacks on the day combined). Neither offense was moving the ball. One can credit good defenses, but it was also bad offense. Drops and play calls that didn’t work. Finally, the Seniors broke through. Option play to Daveo and Daveo chooses to keep the ball, reverse field, and down the sideline…cuts to the middle. He could…go…all…the…nope, Pray tracks him down. Fat boy can run. A few plays later Rabin throws a beautiful pass that no one really knows who it was to, but the flight of the ball was a marvel to behold. It strikes a slanting Daveo right in the hands and Seniors have a 1-0 lead a few minutes before the half.
At that point Yaron decided to stop passing to guys like Pray who were only good for drops and start running the screen game. It worked. It was Prime Time. Even with Daveo and O playing an aggressive middle and pulling flags. Even with Jordan and Tabak sealing the outside and taking on a slew of bruising blockers….the Juniors played very effective bully ball. Well designed and executed screens are hard to stop. Prime is hard to stop when he is amped, and he was amped for VR. He called the Seniors soft and weak over and over as he thundered downfield, picking up yards and first downs. Yards and first downs. Like incontinence, it was a problem the Seniors could not solve. The Juniors found their confidence and scored twice (Pray and Storm). The Seniors offense sputtered to a halt. Besides the one obligatory gorgeous throwback completion from Rabin to Jordan (Est. 2004), the Seniors never punched back. They had opportunities. Short Fields. Tabak – head on a swivel and providing excellent corner play – picked 2 sideline passes intended for Pray to drop. But nothing materialized. The game ended – as it always must – with some controversy as the Seniors hoped to tie the game and maybe send it into OT, but Storm beats Jordan on a slant at the 5 and scores to make it 3-1 as the clock expired. Juniors advance and avenge their 2024 Season VR Semis loss. Jewball to my Assmen, Cronies II, and BLOP brother Stormy for the 2 scores and the intensity. Guy brings it and sets the pace every time I see him out there.
I can’t say I know enough about the actual back and forth of the Rooks Semi-Finals Game. Here is what I do know: Mid-game, Pray yells over to DK, “Why are you trying so hard? You know the game is gonna end in a tie.” A joke. A premonition. In both. It’s been the Freshies v. Smores minhag for a while. Or at least it feels that way. I know that every time I looked over, I saw Avenger and Dachs taking shot after shot. The kids air it out. In contrast to the Vets game which was mainly runs and short yardage plays, the Rooks were taking big swings. The only play I can remember seeing was Landy make a great catch. I saw him make an even better one this past Sunday. The dude in the Seattle Seahawks ski cap can ball. The final score was 4-4. The game went late. There was regular overtime. There was college overtime. Eventually there was I gotta go time. Before I get to the finals, as VR is a day where we count our blessings and realize how lucky we are to be Jewballers with a proud past, an awesome present, and a bright future – where we remind ourselves that Jewball is an exclusive club, but not a closed one. We realized long ago that our strength is in sharing our universe with new blood. Because…doesn’t it seem like every time a new Jewballer arrives and buys in…it was like they were here all along? That’s called destiny. Don’t fight it. Don’t doubt it. Save your cynicism for other aspects of life. It’s warranted in plenty of places. But not by us. Our Rooks have been off the charts these past few seasons. People and players. I’ll just say their names and let the consonants and vowels sing their praises…cuz you all know how insanely blessed we have been: Blitz, Dachs, Daxxy, DK, Ernie, Opes, Stats, Zinn, The Rook, Avenger, Berk, BZ, Kagan, Landy, DJCP, Schiffer, and Spiegel. Of course there are more – but these were the guys who played in the game. Who celebrated the holiday. Who took part in the ritual. We get on the Rooks because they suck and we want them to lose and be humbled…but damn, they are so cool and great. Thank you for being here. Your only job – besides playing great football – is to make sure you are Vets one day and beat the Rooks.
I’ll take this to the sidelines for a moment. You never know who is going to hear the call. VR has been a day special guests come out. They know it’s a spectacle. They understand it’s a pilgrimage worth making. I remember being in the middle of the frenzy of Seniors v. Juniors when a statuesque figure strolled onto the field from the parking lot. And someone said, “Is that Jack Ross?” And so it was. Not much else to say, but, was great to see Jack. In general, but especially on VR Sunday…because it’s not just an appearance. It’s a meaningful appearance. Thanks for coming out, Jack. LGM.
Word had come down on Saturday night that Lego had sustained an injury playing football, I think on Saturday night. Somewhere. Monsey. Lakewood. Who knows. An ankle. He tested it, but there was too much pain and he was out now for VR. The QB depth chart for the Freshies is, well, deep, and Avenger stepped right in. The Captain depth chart was also apparently deep as Lego had replaced Logic and I’m not sure who replaced Lego. Maybe no one did, but who needs Captains when you have beers. The beauty of Jewball is ROY is an all encompassing award. And while you got Avenger, Berk, DJCP, Schiffer, Landy, and Spiegel making plays on the field this VR Sunday, Lego makes sure to quite literally say hold my beer. The scene was then set. Blue Moons and Pink Juice on the sideline, all of a sudden the weather got cold. There were snow flurries earlier in the morning when temps were mild, but as the finals would begin, things got icy.
No clear winner in the Rooks game, but I checked the stats. DK and Oppen teamed up for 7 sacks. Avenger…yikes. Kagan, BZ, and Landy teamed up for 7 of their own. Dachs….geez. Landy came away with some crazy numbers. 3 TDs, a pick, and a sack. No Jewball in a tie game, but definitely an honorable mention. On the other side, we had Stats putting up 3 scores. So….you both were robbed.
The Finals became a classic VR with all the Vets present playing against all the Rooks present. Just like Mighty (kinda) dreamed of. Was it a VR for the ages? No. Everyone was exhausted and beat. I was pretty ripped on Pink Juice by the second half. I knew I had one role and that was to keep everyone hydrated! Zinn, Ernie (both Rook TDs), and Opes were so battered and broken – was exhilarating to watch them push themselves and stay in the game. You watch these dudes – it makes your run that extra mile in the gym, add the weight, finish the set. Regular normals don’t know. They just don’t know. I wish I could tell you that back and forth, but I’m stuck with the box score and the celebration with Mighty scoring the game winning TD. I’m seeing 3 sacks for Legs. I’m seeing 2 scores for Prime. Let’s give that VR Finals Jewball to Prime for 2 scores, but – like Storm – showing up for VR and knowing that another gear needs to be on display. He hated the Vets when he was a Rook. He hates the Seniors when he is a Junior. He hates the Rooks now that he is a Vet. He loves Jewball with his heart and soul.
Jewball, this Vet is once again stunned by where we are and how God blesses us with phenomenal Rooks year after year after year. Rooks, as much as we want to beat and humble you, we keep showing up and working because we can’t imagine a world where we don’t have the privilege of sharing a football field with you and competing (yes, that’s us competing! Shut up!) Much love to you all. Next season in Jerusalem.

– Jordan

January 25, 2026… that was our last football game. A week 17 tackle game in the heart of a blizzard. But then snow turned to ice and the turf was nowhere to be seen. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into a month. But jewball persevered. While some traditions were postponed or updated, we pushed on. Super bowl bbq turned into super bowl breakfast at the Kut home. What should have been week 20 turned into the prancing bowl. Finally though the rain came and the temps got warmer and the field was there once again. Week 18 would finally be played. Just barely though as more snow would come during the game. But a beautiful 3 game jewball sunday morning was had. Can’t say it was worth the wait bc a month without football is too long, but football was back.

On the first side of the field we had Green Machine vs Stogies. Both teams trying to bounce back from losses in their previous league game. Stogies struck first with an opening drive td to gronk and just marched their way down the field with dump offs to dk and stella. 6-0 stogies. Green machine took a while to get going and the score would stay at 6-0 for a while. Stogies marched their way down the field once again and had first and goal from the 5 with a chance to go up two scores. But the GM captain was sneaky and jumped back from d line to the middle to pick a slant off to gronk and returned it 50 yards and gave GM the momentum they needed. three plays later it was captain daveo once again with a dump off from Avenger for a td. 6-6. Unfortunately, the game took a pause then. I didn’t see what happened but it was described as gruesome. Tom went down with an injury and the game stopped to make sure that the In Both vet was okay. He was not. With his wrist bent the wrong way, Tom was rushed off the field. RS Tom! We will see you back on the field soon. Tom doesn’t get enough credit for it, but the man always plays every game. He is the true definition of in both and still doing it at 40. He’s our snow game majestic horse. You’ve bounced back from having Bert as a brother, this is nothing. Feel Better! Eventually, the game continued and Avenger ran one in to make it 13-6 after the extra point. Stogies would falter on their next drive and GM had the ball with a chance to ice the game. On 3rd and goal from the 15, avenger tossed a beautiful touch pass to the back of the endzone for berk.. who hauled it in, toe tapped… and then got rocked by landy and couldn’t hang on to the ball through the ground. An incredible effort, but landy made the defensive stop. GM couldn’t punch it in and Stogies were now down to their final drive. score and a two point conversion would give them the win. a few short plays by yaron set up 4th and 3 to keep the drive going. But a toss to gronk across the middle got knocked down Captain Daveo again and the game would end. 13-6 Green Machine. Jewball to the GM of GM and their captain Daveo on the all around offense and defense in this one.

On the other side of the field it was Semi Pro v. Gorillaz. Last time these two teams played there was controversy abound and it took away from the incredibly close game that it was. This time there was no controversy…..there also wasn’t much of an incredibly close game. SP was without their captain as he was off visiting Jordan in the holy land. But SP (aka solo) came out with a fire that we haven’t seen in some time. When Solo first started playing Jewball he was a dream that Yaron had invented and no one really knew if he was real. Then he finally showed up and dominated. But then solo moved far away and we saw less and less of him. Sunday he was determined to show that he should not be forgotten. After three and outs by both teams, SP took the ball and started moving. a quick out to stats, a dumpf off to solo and a few short plays to storm. set up a 3rd and 3 from the 47 yard line. A designed run by pray got SP the first down but as pray looked up after crossing the first down marker…. it was three gorillaz in sight and one solo. That was all SP needed. Solo proceeded to mow down zada, mighty and rook en route to a 30 yard rushing td for pray. 6-0 SP. Gorillaz took the ball back and moved methodically until on 3rd and 10, lego stepped up in the pocket and was met by a flying solo and pummeled to the turf. Following drive for SP , it was again dump offs to solo and storm culminating in a solo hand off that he took to the house from 20 out to make it 12-0. Stats extra point made it 13-0. Gorilaz then put together their best drive of the game. and had 3rd and 12 past midfield. A lego pass to Goldberg made it 4th and 1. Can’t say for sure exactly what happened but lego tried catching SP off guard and hurried to the line to try a quick play. Unfortunately, that quick play caught everyone off guard and Lego ran directly into solo. Once again Solo pummeled lego into the ground, despite legos outstretched arm it was a turnover on downs. Three plays later it was pray to DJCP (not urkel because he wasn’t wearing the glasses) for a 20 yard td 19-0 SP. Sp got the ball back again and it was djcp for his second td of the game on a ten yard slant to make it 25-0. SP set up for the extra point but a tipped ball by zada led to a mighty int and he was off to the races. 80 yards on a zig zaggin winding return for the rat and it was 25-1. SP would score one more time, this one to storm and a stats phill philly extra point to pray capped the game at 32-1. Gorilaz finally got on the board again after a mighty td to make it 32-7. If you couldn’t tell solo absolutely dominated this one. On both sides of the ball he reminded jewball (and lego) of just how terrifying he could be. Jewball to you. Together with Sam and Spiegel the O line and D line of SP had a day. DJCP would have gotten a jewball but this day was the solo domination one.

In game 2 It was colors of yaron, blitz, bz, spiegel, steveo, storm, and zinn vs. dark of pray, gronk, rabin, kagan, prime, rook and stats. Colors struck first. After a leaping vintage zinn catch over stats, it was storm hurdling the defense to go up 1-0. Dark would put good drives together but each one would end in pray throwing an int (first to storm and then zinn). Whether it was the hangover from a big league win or the ferocious pass rush of blitz, bz and spiegel, it was a redzone int to storm and then a redzone int to zinn to shut down the first two drives of the game. Lucky for Dark, Colors didnt take too much advantage and only scored one more time on a flea flicker td from yaron to storm to make it 2-0. Then the snow started to fall and the QB of Colors made the infamous statement “if I win this counts as a snow game”……. whether the football gods have a sense of humor or that comment enraged Dark enough. They got to work and quick. An angry prime started doing what he does best and catching quick outs and slant and running through people for chunk yards. A 7 play drive ended with a pray to gronk slant to make it 2-1. next drive it was kagan on an out and up from 25 out to make it 2-2. two drives later it was dark with a chance to win it but a pray deep ball to rook was picked off by storm and the game went to overtime. Yaron tried to answer quickly and a deep ball to zinn was picked off by pray and now dark was playing for the win. Dark went right back to the well and hit a quick out to prime to go get them the chunk yards once again. Steveo came up to make the stop and went low for the flag and all we heard was a muted scream. Steveo bloodied all over his face would have to leave. Refuah Shleima Wizard! We will see you back on the field very soon. We went to 6s for the last two plays and on 4th and goal from the six, it was rook in the back of the end zone to win it 3-2. Jewball to kagan in this one for 1 td and being a willing third blocker all game. Also three sacks on the day in huge spots to keep Colors out of the redzone. Storm was on his way to a jewball with the two tds and two ints…..Season of bartender.

Snow….there’s nothing like it. Yes, some find it annoying and dangerous, but when looked at through the proper glasses there’s something scenic and peaceful about the white fluffy cloud-like substance coating the earth. Yet, some snow comes down so hard and blizzard like that there’s nothing calm about it. It revs something up inside of you that can only mean one thing……tackle football. This would now be our third tackle game of the season, an enormous number that we haven’t seen in years. We’re lucky to get one per year. Ecstatic if we get two. Three??…..almost unheard of. The last time being the 2020-2021 season.

It was colors of yaron, landy, zinn, urkel, logic, mandelbread, and tom vs dark of pray, bert, bz, prime, steveo, daveo, and the mighty snowdent. With the snow coming down hard the first few drives were sloppy three and outs (with one monster sack by yaron on third and goal off a well timed blitz). But then dark got clicking, a slant to daveo, a run by prime, and a deep ball to mighty set up third and 10 from the 40. A screen to mighty was all they would need and dark had the first down and then some as the snowdent took off down the sideline to open the scoring 1-0. The next drive colors got after it and worked the ball down the field with runs to landy and a tom catch and run of 35 to make it first and goal from the 24. After a yaron tush push where the ball may or may not have been stripped by mighty, it was determined that the first down was reached and colors would maintain possession. However, a chance to tie it up on a pass from yaron to zinn was just a bit behind and tips up into the hands of pray for an int. Next drive, Dark was right back at it with a mix of runs and slants, even hitting Bert on a tight end leak for 15 yards. After a logic sack, it was third and goal from the 20 for dark with a chance to go up 2-0. And that’s exactly what they did. With pray evading a zinn blitz, the ball just barely got off and into the waiting hands of prime who adjusts and makes the catch in the endzone. 2-0 dark. Unfortunately for colors, their fortune would go from bad to worse and three drives in a row ended with ints. The first one by pray, his second of the day, on a pass intended for tom. After a lateral to Steveo, it was 1st and goal from the 11. After a pray run to bring them inside the 1 yard line, it was a forward pitch to bz and tush push to bring the score to 3-0. One play later it was a daveo pick six to make it 4-0 dark and the game getting out of hand. Colors would make a qb switch to Zinn but on his first play he lofts a ball up the sideline to urkel that gets picked by steveo island (no map needed) and it’s dark ball once again. Two plays later it’s daveo finding the endzone on a quick tight end leak to make the score 5-0. Colors would finally get on the board with zinn at qb and after some good qb runs and dump offs to landy, urkel, and tom, it was logic in the back of the endzone on 4th and goal to get colors on the board 5-1. Both dark and colors would go three and out on the next two drives to end this game at 5-1 dark. Another awesome snow tackle game for jewball. A lot of jewball worthy candidates in this one, especially with guys keeping track of their tackles. Mighty led the day with 9 and a maybe forced fumble, prime with 7, pray with .5 (ya i sucked at tackling today) but the Jewball winner this week goes to Daveo. A td, a pick six, and a bunch of other catches and huge defensive stops in this one, the GM of Green Machine was all over the place on both sides of the ball.

Tackle games are infectious and bring out the best of jewball. It’s a high that you can only get once you’ve played them. Not saying you should or shouldn’t but if you do….. congrats daveo.

Who wants week 18! IJWT!

Week 9 was the return of leagues. We had SP v. BLOP two teams in desperate need of a win. BLOP took the ball first and went three and out. SP took over and went to work, methodically moving the ball down the field, resulting in a td to vegh….without his two feet in and four plays later resulting in a td to vegh with his feet in. Extra point to stats made it 7-0 early. Blop then had arguably one of their best drives of the day and got the ball to the 1 yard line. After a defensive PI, Dachs dropped back and threw a patented curl at the pylon to…..not mordy…..instead it was Zinn and whether the connection on the curl isnt there or the ball floated away, pray jumped it and returned it to the other 15 yard line setting up a td to storm to make it 13-0 SP. Similar to their last league game though, you cannot count the combo of Zinn, Dachs, and Prime out. Eventually they punched the ball into the endzone with a pretty toe tap by dobs to make it 13-6. SP answered back right away and after a portal catch and run and a solo catch and run, pray ran it in to make it 19-6. It was 928 and the game all but over but dachs hit landy on a quick crosser and landy took it the distance to make it 19-12. SP took the ball back with a chance to ice it but decided that after their defense had put up 5 sacks by solo and 2 ints, they would play it safe. Three run plays and they gave the ball back to BLOP for their final drive. The first play of the drive solo did what he had been doing all day and racked up his 6th sack of the day. two plays later a 3rd int by pray ended the game. 19-12 final. Jewball to Solo for the absolutely monster day. A Myles Garret like performance, absolute dominance.

On the other side it was GM v. Stogies. Stogies looking to continue their undefeated start and GM looking to shake off a tough loss to Gorilaz. Unfortunately for stogies this just wasnt their day. a final score of 31-6. Some say it was because DK wasnt there and oppen wasnt supposed to be there but there is a cute irony in the fact that Oppen aka Mr. RT took down stogies to ensure that BOP continues to remain the only undefeated team in jewball history. A team that both Captain Daveo and Stella were a part of. I truly saw no part of this game other than hearing it was violent. I believe ice scored twice and avenger ran a few in. Also saw the tail end of gronk catching a few balls over steveos head deep down the field. I also believe that Ice got his second look at qb for a little while in this one. The details are a bit fuzzy but Avenger disappeared and Ice ran one in. Eventually ice will realize that qbs are supposed to throw the ball. Jewball to avenger for the three tds thrown, 1 rushing td and 1 int on defense and most of all for not pulling a peeve on the field.

In the late game it was dark of yaron, bz, kagan, prime, stats, gronk and new guy mandelabum vs. colors of pray ice, storm, tom, dobs, rook, and new guy ezra. This game was a close one to start out with yaron hitting stats on a deep ball td and pray answering right back with a td to ezra. Yaron jumped out to a 3-1 lead with tds to bz and gronk. Pray answered with a td to ice but then stats went down and popped his shoulder back into place. The guy who is known for his flag grabbing, grabbed the flag so hard that his shoulder stayed with the flag RS Stats! and the game would go to 6s. Whether it was the stench of the league game that took over for yaron and gronk or the high that pray ice storm and tom were feeling the game got out of hand quickly. Pray hit rook for a td and ezra for another and ice ran one to make it 5-3. dark scored twice more in “garbage time” and colors capped it off with a trick play passing td by ezra or chad chinnenburg as some were calling him to rook for a 6-5 final. The final score in this one does not tell the full story. Feels weird to give a jewball to someone who isnt in jewball just yet but 2 receiving tds and a passing td would deserve it. instead its going to rook for the two tds scored and just bringing tremendous pressure all day as a third rusher and batting down balls right and left.

Week 10 is here and we are just about halfway through the Jewball season. Who wants it IJWT.

Turkey bowl came with a few last minute team/game adjustments but at the end of the day we could not have asked for a better Turkey day than what we got. Yes were some of the games less than desirable in terms of the football- sure. but the fact that we got jewballers past, present, and future out to the field to play some football, eat some turkey, wings and donuts, and just overall experience a beautiful jewball thanksgiving was beyond gratifying. In one game Ice played qb and led his team to victory on a jump throw game winner to daveo (yes the OT rules were slightly changed for Turkey Bowl). On the other side it was Lego v Avenger. Again, didn’t see much of the game but I believe Avenger pulled out the W in a tight contest. Lego unfortunately didn’t have a great day throwing the ball but hey when you’re not throwing tds you may as well throw picks. But even in the losing effort highlights of the day may have been Lego scoring a rushing td and Hingle Mpringleberrying the td pumps to perfection.

The early games ended, the traditional jewball pic was taken (thank you Sheriff) and kut arrived with trays of steaming wings and turkey legs. Game 2 eventually started and other than taking some turkey leg eating breaks was pretty uneventful. It was pray (orange) v. gronk (brown) and seemed like mighty for brown and sheriff for orange were just running wild all over the field. There were trick plays, there were laterals to the wrong team, but all in the spirit of good turkey bowl fun. Brown scored 5 i believe and remember socks just running the entire field towards the end of the game to tie it up. But i believe the final score was 6-5 orange after a flip to schiffer for the game winner. Regardless, after the donuts and turkey….. we were all winners. Truly was a remarkable showing and can imagine we made jewball proud. Really showed how the melting pot of jewball works with all people of every background coming together towards one goal.

There’s no world that exists where Prime and I would become best friends let alone even know each other. There’s no world that exists that people who maybe a few months or years ago were absolute strangers would be eating off the same turkey legs as each other…. true story. but that world does exist. It exists right here in our island of Jewball. For better or worse there are people who live next door to you or co-workers or other friends who we will never have that same connection with. There’s no rhyme or reason to it but just gratitude and thanks to one above for leading us all here and continuing on this crazy Jewball adventure.

Of course there was a part of Jewball missing without Jordan there and Amy’s pecan bars but as we hopefully follow along on jordans newest football journey in the holy land, a part of Jewball is now there to create more and more jewball connections. I heard that there was a Jewball turkey bowl in cleveland last week. Imagine, as crazy as it sounds, that wherever you go there is a Jewball connection and something bringing you back to this island. Imagine one of the new rooks who played on thanksgiving, even if we never see him again, may one day bump into someone and they’ll realize the connection they have back to this place. with a little WWJD (what would J do.. for spira) it really is possible. We’re almost at the midpoint of the season. Let’s make this second half just as awesome as the first.

Week 8 started with the jewball usual of two early games side by side. On the one side it was the OG matchup of pray v yaron and the other side it was the Avenger taking on Feit.

Unfortunately for the first game, we had some late cancellations and the game started with dark of pray, E, DK., Ice, POrtal, and Stella taking on colors of Yaron, Steve-O, sam, oppen, logan, bert, and storm. The game was close for a little while but bc we were playing 6s instead of 7s there was just too much speed on the field for dark leading to long tds by ice, portal and a pray rushing td. Colors fought back with yaron throwing tds to storm and bert and a late game bullet to the back of the endzone to sam who toe tapped to stay in bounds. but that was all that colors would put up. Dk was a monster for dark with three sacks and E was racking up catch after catch in the middle of the field to keep dark’s drives alive. Ultimately Stella would score and portal and ice would each get one more to end this game 6-3 dark. One play that absolutely needs to be mentioned is portal taking a tipped ball 99 yards to the house….except Dk BERTcalf stalks him down and grabs his flag at the one. Just a crazy hustle play all around but bert saved a td (dark scored on the next play but that’s not important). As we all saw on the glasses recap and stats machine, Portal had quite the day. Jewball to portal for the pick and 2 tds.

Onto the other and seemingly much more exciting early game. It was dark of avenger, bz, landy, mighty, prime, schiffer, and stats v. Colors of feit, justin, rook, zada, zinn, daveo, and berk. This game was a pick fest with avenger throwing 2 to berk and rook and feit throwing 3- two to stats and one to landy. In true TBI fashion I dont know how the game flow went at all but it seemed like a tight game throughout the contest. Avenger was spreading the rock around throwing tds to landy, mighty, schiffer, and bz (we will get to that in a second) and feit throwing a td to daveo and zinn and feit each running one in. The one play I did see was certainly the most impactful. With a tie game and dark on their last chance to try and win it…. avenger dropped back from the 5 yard line, bought himself some time with his patented hip twists, and threw a cross body floater to bz who corralled it with one hand and secured it for the go ahead score. Jewball to bz for the game winner and 5!! sacks on the day.

In the late game it was colors of yaron, bin, bk, dk, stats, rook, and zinn vs. dark of pray, dietsch, kut, logan, oppen, prime, and storm. This was an absolute blood bath. Don’t know if dark ever got a stop on defense and I believe cool yaron scored all 7 times he touched the ball. hitting zinn, rook, and stats for 2 a piece and one to dk. As ugly of a blowout game 1a was, this one was somehow worse. a 7-2 shellacking and a jewball to yaron for the 7 tds thrown. Unfortunately for storm, logan and oppen they were on the losing side of both these blowouts. Fortunately for DK he was on the winning side and racked up 5 sacks on the day and was just an absolute menace chasing people down and making sure that no one escaped his sacks. add to that a bunch of catches and a td and DK you are the in both player of the week. The lone highlight for dark in this one was a forward lateral receiving td by oppen that just counted bc it needed to… it was that type of game.

Week 3 started with some late last minute sign ups and a late saturday night posting of the teams but ended up with some of our most competitive games yet on this young season.

In the first early game it was jewballs last qb phenom in dachs set to square off against the new phenom in lego. lego had his work cut out for him going up against ice, bz, dobs, landy, tom and oppen but he had his own weapons of prime goldberg, e, whiskey, justin and rook to match the fire power. although the final score of this game, 7-5, would make one think there was no defense….. there were 7, i repeat 7, interceptions thrown between the two qbs. game got started with dachs picking apart the defense and hitting a quick score to ice only to be immediately countered with a beautiful lego td to rook over the outstretched arms of dachs at safety. I don’t know what the score was when the ints started but seemed to be a tie game through most of it. however everytime we looked over from the other side of the field someone new was running the wrong way with the football. first prime ices iceman leading to a rook pick six and then ice takes one away from lego leading to a dobs td. whether it was the pressure from oppen or the swarming defense lego was throwing some picks. the only thing to do when you get to play both sides though is if you throw a few, you better get a few back on d and that’s exaclty what lego did, fast forward a few plays lego picks off two from dachs leading to tds for goldberg and a real pretty one to prime in the back of the end zone. dachs took a one score lead late in the game throwing another td to ice for his third of the day. Lego had a chance to tie on his last licks drive of the day. and as he drops back to pass he sees what we described as “dachs running the most perfect crossing route”. He loads up, fires… and dachs takes it back for six to seal the deal. second game in a row where dachs makes a huge play on defense seal the deal. the rookie finally takes his first L of the season in what seemed to be an incredible game all around. Jewball to the iceman and current td leader with the 3 td 2 int game. strong stuff from ice cream.

In game 1b it was yaron v pray. the most classic of jewball qb matchups that weve had over the last few years. This was a tight one back and forth as well with yaron opening the scoring with a td to schiffer and colors marching back down with a pray td to kagan on a quick slant past the blitzing mighty. Yaron answered back right away with a methodically long drive and a td to mighty. stella wilmer captain stogie answers right back with a td of his own on a screen pass barreling his way in to tie it at 2. yaron marches right back down and hits none other than the rat who does it again -weaving through the defense for another td giving dark a 3-2 lead. colors gets the ball back and pray calls his own number, dancing through traffic and picking up incredible blocks from stats spiegel and ernie on his way for a 70 yard rushing td to tie the game at three. yaron again having himself a day throws a td to schiffer to make it 4-3 dark. thats when the game started to slip away for colors. Pray on a third and long heaves one deep to stella but underthrows it and mighty makes the jump on it to pick it off. Immediately after, yaron throws an absolute bomb to new rookie akiva to make it 5-3. it was back against the wall time for colors after going for it on fourth and forever and not converting. yaron got the ball back with a chance to ice the game with a first and goal from the 15. but between spiegal and bert on the line, colors gets a huge sack, pushes yaron out of the redzone and manages to get the ball back. first play of the next color possession ernie makes a circus type catch and runs it in from 40 yards out to make it a 5-4 game. Dark gets the ball back. a score would end it as it’s 935 and the game is over by 940. yaron is one of those guys who never sees color. he treats everyone with the respect and dignity that they deserve. on this drive he refused to see color as well and throws a perfect shovel pass to…. stats at the five yard line. the biggest play in the biggest moment made by stats to set colors up for a game tying opportunity with first and goal from the 5. after a couple of incompletions. colors punches it in on a quick slant from pray to ernie that the muppet secures to tie the game at 5. Ties are not wins and they are not losses. Ties are ties. they are an ugly but necessary evil at times. however there are times that ties feel like a loss and times that ties feel like a win. for colors this one felt like a win. down 5-3 with 2 drives left and came all the way back to not take a loss. no jewball for this one but huge shoutout to bert and speigel for the clutch line play down the stretch and ernie and stats for the game saving td and int respectfully. schiffer was prob gearing up for his first jewball had dark pulled it off but only an honorable mention for now.

one final note from the game 1 is that both games started after 810. Guys….game starting at 8 means exactly that…game starting at 8. yes is there an unwritten grace period for a couple of minutes. sure. but that doesnt mean show up at 8 or 815. it means be there at 755, cleats on and ready to warm up so we can actually start at 8. were coming up on week 4 – lets fix this, especially with leagues coming up next week.

onto game 2 where avenger was making his first start of the season at qb. he lined up with his bro- davinger, iceman, justin, logan, prime and stella against yaron pray lego (at wr) kagan tom danny/stats and oppen. Danny made his long awaited return to the field. unfortunately it was short lived and on the third drive of the game he tore his patella tendon. rest up and feel good danny. wishing you a full recovery! but This game picked up where the other left off with an int by yaron to start the game, followed by avenger saying I dont want any free drives and proceeding to throw the ball about 75 yards directly up in the air for an int to pray. it was basically the opposite of a rabin screen pass. unfortunately yaron and co did nothing with that drive and it was avenger scoring first with a td to iceman. yaron finally started moving, hitting a td to stats and a few missed flags later he was in the endzone. yaron scored again on a td to pray leaking from tight end to make it 2-1. aveneger answered immediately with a quick slant to prime and a quick spin and stiff arm later he was down the sideline to tie it up at 2. the game stayed at 2-2 for a while but that doesnt mean there wasnt any action. it really started before the game when lego ripped his shorts and asked logan for a new pair. then logan flag grabbed lego before the pass was thrown. finally logan just wanted to be 100000% sure that lego wasnt wearing his shorts and went for a full investigation. with lego hobbled and on one ball he moved to tight end. and yaron started feeding him. finally the scoring drought broke with a yaron pass to stats who lateraled to pray and blocked stella in one motion for a td. as the hour was getting late avenger had a chance to tie and threw a deep ball to prime who also decided to flag grab lego as lego intercepted the pass effectively ending any chance for dark to come back. Yaron threw a late td to tom to seal the game in a 4-2 final. Jewball to stats for this one. although he only had the one td. the flip play he had was the go ahead score and was just an increidble play. beyond that, he somehow tracked down every flag on defense, got trucked by ice on a block, and literally left his blood all over the field and ball. Awesome game stats!

Last but not least, we finally have an in both player of the week. as everyone knows playing both is tough, its physically and mentally draining, yet there’s nothing like it. Its an adrenaline rush that just makes you want to keep going. However, i get to say that from a position of playing qb or sometimes wr. I cannot imagine what playing both as a lineman might feel like. and i dont mean a rotating linemen. i mean a guy who literally does not leave the offensive or defensive line AT ALL and somehow still manages to bring it every. single. play. Oppen you are the inaugural first ever in both player of the week. While i didn’t see much of game 1 i did see dachs standing in the pokcet with no one near him every play. i also saw lego dancing around trying to avoid you. in game 2 it was more of the same. you were asked to play tight end and your answer was just a simple “no im an offensive lineman” in an almost military like tone. only one sack on the day for you but two W’s in a dominant performance. take this week off. you deserve it.

We got leagues this week. GM. v SP and Gorilaz v. Stogies. followed by a late game. Who wants week 4!

As League playoffs start in a few hours, I would be even more remiss than usual if I didn’t get out – even in this flimsy manner – a recap for the final week of League Games. Meanwhile, I’m watching Heretic, which is brilliant. With first place on the line, Gorillaz and Reapers squared up to prove who goes into the playoffs with the most swagger. Steve-O, with as low key a façade as they come, managed to show his interior depth once again, by way of his drafting. The team seemed scattershot and incongruent. Would Solo be engaged? Could Feit shake off the Top Guns PTSD? Could Mighty have an MVP season? I mean…..it’s as if the Wizard knew the future. Just not sure how far into his crystal ball he has seen. I guess we find out in the morning. Although there has been no fully dominant team like 2023’s Birds of Pray or 2022’s Roll Tide, The Reapers have been the class of Leagues this season. Gorillaz and Carnivores started strong. The Ducks had their moment in the sun. But in the end….
This game was a low scoring, by the numbers affair. Although I was on the other field (to be recapped), I have to presume there was great defense. Of course Mighty had 2 scores – and that’s all the Reaper offense needed. I was lucky enough to look up and see a behind the back lateral from Goldberg to Mighty. Based on the box score, Pray did all he could. The reigning MVP threw 1, picked 2 (one of em for 6), but the extra point does him in and Reapers take the top spot by a single point. Feit takes a team to 1st place. Solo is engaged AF. Mighty gets another Jewball. Reapers making this very interesting.
With nothing to play for, of course Yaron puts it all together and wins. The Ducks had eliminated BLOP with their prior W and was all about healing and filling in holes (pause) on Week 19. But some things – some injuries – a week or two off won’t cure. And that was the position Ernie and his Ducks found (and find) themselves in as both BK and Tommy – two stalwart players – the muscle of the Ducks – sustained season ending injuries. They got Stats and Kagan to replace Tommy and BK, but was a wet day, very slippery. And while Dachs merely had the flu, his team suffered from dropsy. BLOP was just bullying. They punched in all the TDs that eluded them all season. Yaron throws 6 and Ice Man throws 1. Jewball to OPY Ice for 3 TDs, 1 thrown, and 3 picks.
The late game a blow out with Zinn asserting his dominance as a QB and multi-tiered threat. Ran for 2, threw 2 and a pick 6. Kut continued to be an offensive juggernaut with 2 scores. Pray finishes off a low caliber day for him – throwing only 1 TD to Prime. That’s 2 TDs thrown by Pray on an IN BOTH day. Rough one for the MVP. Let’s see how he does tomorrow when everything is on the line.