Month: December 2025

Week 10 – Recap

Week 10 had one of the biggest games of the season on tap. Semi Pro v Gorillaz. Both teams coming off huge wins to even out their records at 1-1 and now being given the chance to jump into a three way tie for the 1 seed with GM and Stogies at 2-1. The storylines were set with Pray going up against his former team and the new rookie phenom in Lego trying to prove to his defending champ captain Rook that he can QB the Gorillaz to the promised land as well. The game started off how Lego ended the last one against GM, by running the ball. A LOT. three big runs by Lego plus one mighty scamper on a screen…ending with a quick slant to mighty for an early 6-0 lead. But Semi-Pro have some real battle tested vets on their squad. Led by guys like solo and storm, SP marched down the field using quick pass after quick pass and pray hitting solo on an out route in front of lego to tie the game at 6. Gorillaz offense took the ball back and did not change the recipe… runs, runs, and more runs and on 3rd and goal from the 15, lego fakes a handoff to mighty and bootlegs it himself to take a 12-6 lead. a strike to Captain TP for the extra point made it 13-6. SP again took the ball back and knew that they would have to up the energy if they wanted to hang around with Gorilaz. Enter DJCP. Portal, a sorta super rookie because he played some games last year, is nothing if not an energizer bunny. Whether it’s because he can’t stop talking or because he’s all over the field. Portal took catch after catch on this drive and ended up with a 12 yard strike to the back of the endzone for a td. After a vegh toe tap extra point it was again tied 13-13. Whether SP’s defense couldn’t hold up or Gorillaz are just a tough offense to stop, it only took one play for Gorillaz to make it 20-13 – a mighty screen goes for 70 to the house. Game was anything but over and SP marched right back down the field and into the redzone for a chance to tie it up once more. Pray dropped back, gave a quick shoulder pump to Werz who was filling in for stats, lego bites, Werz flew by him and all that’s needed is to secure the catch to tie the game up. Except sometimes things don’t work out as expected, the ball goes through his hands and it’s a turnover inside the RZ for SP. Lego made quick work to take a two touchdown lead and it was a 35 yard strike to rook up the sideline for a 26-13 lead. It was 9:15 and the game appeared to be over. At least that’s how the conversation seemed to have gone between pray and zada. but SP was determined to FIGHT back (get it bc of the fights :))). On 4th and 13 Pray heaves up a prayer down the field to storm who secures the catch and brings it inside the 15 yard line. Two plays later Mr. Meta goggles himself brings in his 6th catch and 2nd TD of the game to make it 26-19. SP is right back in it. Gorilaz take the ball back with a chance to ice it. If they score its over, if they dont SP has one final chance to try and go win the game. On 4th and 2 from their own 23, Gorilaz decide to go for it. Lego drops back and takes off to the right…he has a clear lane to pick up the first and continue their drive but perhaps it was some crazy jewball foreshadowing of the discussions that would take place during the week, it was ROY on ROY and portal dives to grab his flag just before the first down marker. New life to SP. 4 plays to punch it in and walk off the win. 1st down pray takes a shot into the endzone to vegh but its broken up by rook. 2nd down pray hits storm on a quick curl, storm breaks a tackle and takes the ball just inside the 10 yard line. SP has their chance. 3rd down pray takes the snap and starts rolling to the right. The plan is to hit vegh on an out, let portal unseat lego as the ROY on a block, and SP goes home with the W. Except Rabbi BZ had other plans. He somehow blows by the SP line and has pray in his crosshairs. Pray tries reversing the field but BZ was already calculating the exact amount of force in which to throw the pas hab’ah b’kisnin donut man to the ground (that’s for Rabbi BZ). BZ pile drives pray down for a 10 yard sack. It’s now 4th and goal from the 20 and win percentage for SP just went about as low as goldbergs hand gets on a flag guard call. On 4th down, pray drops back and gets flushed all the way to the left, throws it cross field to storm who breaks a tackle and has a lane, there’s daylight to the endzone and SP may just have a chance…. unfortunately the sea closed up pretty quickly and gorilaz grab storm at the 2 ending the game and securing their victory. An absolutely incredible game that will be remembered just for that and nothing else. 26-19 Gorilaz is the final. So many worthy jewball candidates for this win but it’s going to our reigning mvp and my bath buddy Mr. Mighty Rat. Showing just how elusive and quick he still is with the YAC and two tds in this one. #statsfortherat.

In Game 1b it was dark of yaron, zinn, bert, landy, steveo, and stella v colors of avenger, berk, oppen, prime, big E, and Eggo. Before we get into the game we have to talk about time…..this game started close to 8:30. Simply put, that is unacceptable. Nobody wants to be standing around in the cold waiting for the last few people to trickle in so the game can start and that’s especially true when it’s a 6 on 6. When we say the early game is at 8 that means cleats on at 7:55 throwing the ball around. Not getting into your car or finishing your coffee or taking a dump. It’s one thing to give a buffer of a few minutes but 830 is egregious and simply wrong. If you can’t show up at 755 then don’t play the early game. Now onto the game….From what I was told this was a back and forth battle as well but yaron had the win in hand until chumash plays called and zinn threw a pick six to Eggo to secure the Win for colors. I did see a really cool trick play that zinn threw back to yaron and berk picked off to return to the house as well as avenger on a 4th and forever just evading the entire defense to pick up a first with his patented stop and starts. Jewball to berk in this one for the 2 receiving tds, 1 rushing td, and pick six. doing it all for colors to pick up the W. Put Berk in the ROY convo!

In game 2 there was a lot of passing but not a lot of throwing…..maybe we will save this for Pray’s puzzles on TBI coming soon…..

Who wants week 11. IJWT

Week 9 Recap

Week 9 was the return of leagues. We had SP v. BLOP two teams in desperate need of a win. BLOP took the ball first and went three and out. SP took over and went to work, methodically moving the ball down the field, resulting in a td to vegh….without his two feet in and four plays later resulting in a td to vegh with his feet in. Extra point to stats made it 7-0 early. Blop then had arguably one of their best drives of the day and got the ball to the 1 yard line. After a defensive PI, Dachs dropped back and threw a patented curl at the pylon to…..not mordy…..instead it was Zinn and whether the connection on the curl isnt there or the ball floated away, pray jumped it and returned it to the other 15 yard line setting up a td to storm to make it 13-0 SP. Similar to their last league game though, you cannot count the combo of Zinn, Dachs, and Prime out. Eventually they punched the ball into the endzone with a pretty toe tap by dobs to make it 13-6. SP answered back right away and after a portal catch and run and a solo catch and run, pray ran it in to make it 19-6. It was 928 and the game all but over but dachs hit landy on a quick crosser and landy took it the distance to make it 19-12. SP took the ball back with a chance to ice it but decided that after their defense had put up 5 sacks by solo and 2 ints, they would play it safe. Three run plays and they gave the ball back to BLOP for their final drive. The first play of the drive solo did what he had been doing all day and racked up his 6th sack of the day. two plays later a 3rd int by pray ended the game. 19-12 final. Jewball to Solo for the absolutely monster day. A Myles Garret like performance, absolute dominance.

On the other side it was GM v. Stogies. Stogies looking to continue their undefeated start and GM looking to shake off a tough loss to Gorilaz. Unfortunately for stogies this just wasnt their day. a final score of 31-6. Some say it was because DK wasnt there and oppen wasnt supposed to be there but there is a cute irony in the fact that Oppen aka Mr. RT took down stogies to ensure that BOP continues to remain the only undefeated team in jewball history. A team that both Captain Daveo and Stella were a part of. I truly saw no part of this game other than hearing it was violent. I believe ice scored twice and avenger ran a few in. Also saw the tail end of gronk catching a few balls over steveos head deep down the field. I also believe that Ice got his second look at qb for a little while in this one. The details are a bit fuzzy but Avenger disappeared and Ice ran one in. Eventually ice will realize that qbs are supposed to throw the ball. Jewball to avenger for the three tds thrown, 1 rushing td and 1 int on defense and most of all for not pulling a peeve on the field.

In the late game it was dark of yaron, bz, kagan, prime, stats, gronk and new guy mandelabum vs. colors of pray ice, storm, tom, dobs, rook, and new guy ezra. This game was a close one to start out with yaron hitting stats on a deep ball td and pray answering right back with a td to ezra. Yaron jumped out to a 3-1 lead with tds to bz and gronk. Pray answered with a td to ice but then stats went down and popped his shoulder back into place. The guy who is known for his flag grabbing, grabbed the flag so hard that his shoulder stayed with the flag RS Stats! and the game would go to 6s. Whether it was the stench of the league game that took over for yaron and gronk or the high that pray ice storm and tom were feeling the game got out of hand quickly. Pray hit rook for a td and ezra for another and ice ran one to make it 5-3. dark scored twice more in “garbage time” and colors capped it off with a trick play passing td by ezra or chad chinnenburg as some were calling him to rook for a 6-5 final. The final score in this one does not tell the full story. Feels weird to give a jewball to someone who isnt in jewball just yet but 2 receiving tds and a passing td would deserve it. instead its going to rook for the two tds scored and just bringing tremendous pressure all day as a third rusher and batting down balls right and left.

Week 10 is here and we are just about halfway through the Jewball season. Who wants it IJWT.

TURKEY BOWL RECAP

Turkey bowl came with a few last minute team/game adjustments but at the end of the day we could not have asked for a better Turkey day than what we got. Yes were some of the games less than desirable in terms of the football- sure. but the fact that we got jewballers past, present, and future out to the field to play some football, eat some turkey, wings and donuts, and just overall experience a beautiful jewball thanksgiving was beyond gratifying. In one game Ice played qb and led his team to victory on a jump throw game winner to daveo (yes the OT rules were slightly changed for Turkey Bowl). On the other side it was Lego v Avenger. Again, didn’t see much of the game but I believe Avenger pulled out the W in a tight contest. Lego unfortunately didn’t have a great day throwing the ball but hey when you’re not throwing tds you may as well throw picks. But even in the losing effort highlights of the day may have been Lego scoring a rushing td and Hingle Mpringleberrying the td pumps to perfection.

The early games ended, the traditional jewball pic was taken (thank you Sheriff) and kut arrived with trays of steaming wings and turkey legs. Game 2 eventually started and other than taking some turkey leg eating breaks was pretty uneventful. It was pray (orange) v. gronk (brown) and seemed like mighty for brown and sheriff for orange were just running wild all over the field. There were trick plays, there were laterals to the wrong team, but all in the spirit of good turkey bowl fun. Brown scored 5 i believe and remember socks just running the entire field towards the end of the game to tie it up. But i believe the final score was 6-5 orange after a flip to schiffer for the game winner. Regardless, after the donuts and turkey….. we were all winners. Truly was a remarkable showing and can imagine we made jewball proud. Really showed how the melting pot of jewball works with all people of every background coming together towards one goal.

There’s no world that exists where Prime and I would become best friends let alone even know each other. There’s no world that exists that people who maybe a few months or years ago were absolute strangers would be eating off the same turkey legs as each other…. true story. but that world does exist. It exists right here in our island of Jewball. For better or worse there are people who live next door to you or co-workers or other friends who we will never have that same connection with. There’s no rhyme or reason to it but just gratitude and thanks to one above for leading us all here and continuing on this crazy Jewball adventure.

Of course there was a part of Jewball missing without Jordan there and Amy’s pecan bars but as we hopefully follow along on jordans newest football journey in the holy land, a part of Jewball is now there to create more and more jewball connections. I heard that there was a Jewball turkey bowl in cleveland last week. Imagine, as crazy as it sounds, that wherever you go there is a Jewball connection and something bringing you back to this island. Imagine one of the new rooks who played on thanksgiving, even if we never see him again, may one day bump into someone and they’ll realize the connection they have back to this place. with a little WWJD (what would J do.. for spira) it really is possible. We’re almost at the midpoint of the season. Let’s make this second half just as awesome as the first.

Week 8 Recap

Week 8 started with the jewball usual of two early games side by side. On the one side it was the OG matchup of pray v yaron and the other side it was the Avenger taking on Feit.

Unfortunately for the first game, we had some late cancellations and the game started with dark of pray, E, DK., Ice, POrtal, and Stella taking on colors of Yaron, Steve-O, sam, oppen, logan, bert, and storm. The game was close for a little while but bc we were playing 6s instead of 7s there was just too much speed on the field for dark leading to long tds by ice, portal and a pray rushing td. Colors fought back with yaron throwing tds to storm and bert and a late game bullet to the back of the endzone to sam who toe tapped to stay in bounds. but that was all that colors would put up. Dk was a monster for dark with three sacks and E was racking up catch after catch in the middle of the field to keep dark’s drives alive. Ultimately Stella would score and portal and ice would each get one more to end this game 6-3 dark. One play that absolutely needs to be mentioned is portal taking a tipped ball 99 yards to the house….except Dk BERTcalf stalks him down and grabs his flag at the one. Just a crazy hustle play all around but bert saved a td (dark scored on the next play but that’s not important). As we all saw on the glasses recap and stats machine, Portal had quite the day. Jewball to portal for the pick and 2 tds.

Onto the other and seemingly much more exciting early game. It was dark of avenger, bz, landy, mighty, prime, schiffer, and stats v. Colors of feit, justin, rook, zada, zinn, daveo, and berk. This game was a pick fest with avenger throwing 2 to berk and rook and feit throwing 3- two to stats and one to landy. In true TBI fashion I dont know how the game flow went at all but it seemed like a tight game throughout the contest. Avenger was spreading the rock around throwing tds to landy, mighty, schiffer, and bz (we will get to that in a second) and feit throwing a td to daveo and zinn and feit each running one in. The one play I did see was certainly the most impactful. With a tie game and dark on their last chance to try and win it…. avenger dropped back from the 5 yard line, bought himself some time with his patented hip twists, and threw a cross body floater to bz who corralled it with one hand and secured it for the go ahead score. Jewball to bz for the game winner and 5!! sacks on the day.

In the late game it was colors of yaron, bin, bk, dk, stats, rook, and zinn vs. dark of pray, dietsch, kut, logan, oppen, prime, and storm. This was an absolute blood bath. Don’t know if dark ever got a stop on defense and I believe cool yaron scored all 7 times he touched the ball. hitting zinn, rook, and stats for 2 a piece and one to dk. As ugly of a blowout game 1a was, this one was somehow worse. a 7-2 shellacking and a jewball to yaron for the 7 tds thrown. Unfortunately for storm, logan and oppen they were on the losing side of both these blowouts. Fortunately for DK he was on the winning side and racked up 5 sacks on the day and was just an absolute menace chasing people down and making sure that no one escaped his sacks. add to that a bunch of catches and a td and DK you are the in both player of the week. The lone highlight for dark in this one was a forward lateral receiving td by oppen that just counted bc it needed to… it was that type of game.