Month: January 2021

Week 15 Recap

A PJ’s perspective recap: Jewball has been a staple in my life since I started back in 2007. B-sh invited me to play football little did I know what this 14 year relationship would be. I took a 5 year hiatus in 2013 that I still regret it… but I was starting a new job and had a new kid and I was in so much pain daily.  I thought those were my priorities, boy did i forget what Jewball means to so much of us. Seeing what Singer and Steve- O chatted yesterday, each Sunday means so much for all of us. I know that last year when I had a death in my family playing let me clear my mind. And when I had another family albeit distant relatives death this past week from COVID, getting out there and playing in these games is just so cathartic.  Love this Jewball family… Ok personal sharing time is over…. 

This week signups were low with some Jewballers getting tans in Florida, celebrating Simcha’s, and some just recovering from injuries. Gronk backed out to recover and we were left without a QB for game 2. Goldberg steps up by helping game 1 happen with his plus 1 and then saves game 2 when Rami his plus 1 steps in and makes a competitive game 2 at QB…..More on that later. 

Game 1 has the matchup of the season. Feels like Aikman vs Young weekly. Usually a close matchup each time. But it’s fun to play when these two gun slingers are on. Pray lined up with Storm, Beast (on time), Tabak, Steve-O, whisky, and Sting vs Feit’s not so much Feit club, but it features Singer, Prime, Goldberg, Rami, Vegh, and PJ’s.

The real feel at game time was probably zero degree’s. I offer everyone breakfast on me not to play but these Jewballers care more about football then hypothermia. Oh F—k you guys for your tans and hot weather. You should all need to sit out a week for that crap. Ok back to the game…. it looks like a classic Defensive battle early. Singers blitzing game plan against Pray early is working. Rami picks up a sack and gets good pressure between him and singer. Sting gets hurt but stays in the game.  Feit’s team is just not getting any real yards or completions. Bunch of 3 and outs. But Feit’s defense gets a big picks on Pray by Rami and Prime in the end zone. Nothing seems to be working for either team. Pray throws another ball on the run on Rami has the pick and a return but knocks the ball into the air into the arms of storm who runs it’s all the way and now it’s 1-0 Pray. Feit’s team is still struggling on offense to find rhythm. Beast and whisky are getting in and getting sacks they total 5 on the morning combined. Pray finds Tabak on a nice catch and run to take 2-0 lead. Feit’s team couldn’t grab flags. They also dropped 3 picks, Goldberg, Vegh, and Rami. It’s now 9 am. Singer is trying to motivate his QB and team. Feit drives the team down the field with good short passes to singer and Goldberg. Then he heaves a 30 yard pass to the back of the end zone and hits Prime with 3 balls in for a TD. Next Pray drive singer with a pick 6 and we are all tied at 2. Prager sees the clock and knows that he needs to use up the clock. They are running every play now. Pray to the right or the left and he’s getting first downs. Feit’s team struggling with getting flags and Prays team are blocking. Pray hits Beast on a screen and he goes all the way to take the lead. Feit’s team isn’t able to get anything going and Singer goes down with a knee injury. Feits team is deflated. End of another failed drive. Enters Faux PJ’s who happens to be Prays brother in law. You know when he came in for Singer that only great things would happen and then Pray gets the ball again and runs it’s for a 90 yard TD game over. Pray 4- Feit 2. 

Game 2: with Sting being Stung he has to leave and game 2 looks like it will be 6’s. Someone needs to come. So we go to the chat and no one responds. I decided to hang out and play a few drives to allow them to have 7’s for a short time. I ended up leaving for 10-15
Minutes and then returned so no one had to sit. Shalom Bayis rule #1 if you’re going to lie, have every story planned out so it’s believable and you don’t get caught. And check that Primes couch has room. Back to the game… we have Pray coming off a win ready to roll with Storm, Ivry, Vegh, Salem, Faux PJ’s (Josh, Prays brother in law), and PJ’s vs Rami ( who’s a very solid backup QB and overall player, Goldberg did good!), Prime, Goldberg, Tabak, Beast, Whisky, and Jack “freakin” Ross. 

This game starts off slow. Both teams trying to find themselves. Rami gets sacked tackled by the real PJ’s on his second drive. Pray is finally able to get going by shitting Storm to take a 1-0 lead. Pray would strike again hitting Ivry and taking a 2-0 lead. Rami didn’t want to go down like this so he abandons his conservative play calling and fakes a run right to find a wide open Jack Ross in the middle of the field who takes to to the house and out runs even Pray for a 70 yard TD. And now we have a game. Pray says to Rami. I’ll use my best target again. Ivry lined up as TE, catches a screen pass and avoids Goldberg and the rest of the team to take a 3-1. Prays is looking like he’s going to have a 2 win day. Prime says no my Birds of Prey teammate, I want this one. Rami hits Prime on a short pass and he avoids 3 tackles and takes it the house to make it 3-2. Pray is stalling though. And Rami gets the ball back with 10 minutes to go. And drives down the field gets to the red zone. But Pray’s Defense is getting pressure and making plays. Forces Rami into a 4th and goal at the 11. Rami looks for one man on this field who has height and hands, throws up a ball in the end zone and of course Ross makes an amazing jumping catch to tie the game. Pray gets the ball back to take the lead and gets a good drive going but is backed up into a 4th a long at the 30 and can’t complete it. Tie ball game.

Game 1- Jewball should go to Beast although he did drop a wide open TD. But he had 2.5 sacks and the go ahead TD. 

Game 2- would’ve gone to Ivry or Ross but ended in a tie. 

Signup will be when J says so…. Great week of fun everyone. Sting and Singer I hope you heal quickly. We might get Snow next Sunday…

A week of Mazal Tovs!

In the past week (or 2) several in our Jewball Fam have had wonderful simchas that need to me shared!

Mazal tov to DOBS on his wedding!

Mazal tov to MAOR on his wedding! (not to each other)

And a Mazal tov to Sam #21 the real Primetime on the birth of his son Yehuda Aryeh!

Keep growing jewball fam and making us proud!

Week 14 Recap

On this snowy morning, hard not to think football – and specifically Yaron getting bodied by Tom like a punk ass ho. 
But I digress-
Short day for me and short recap. I’m heading down south for a week. Driving, so will make the requisite football stops along the way. Any Panthers or Jaguars fans…hit me up.
I did catch the end of Week 14 Game 1. Y’know there is a part of me that wants to write a whole recap about Pray. The guy is having an MVP season, and I watch him and just think – damn, he could be so much better. Now, that isn’t really fair. I’ve never been as good as him, plus I’m hobbled in the present. So who am I to criticize? But, then I think…I’m not being critical. I’m not even just saying. I’m actually a fan. And I want Jewball to be its best. So when I watch him lose to Gronk in Game 1 by a score of 3-1 and some people are telling me that the teams aren’t fair or whatever….first of all – the teams were fair – yer a bitch. And also….eveyone needs to step up their game. Pray, you say hike….take 5 steps back and start running – mostly to your right. Does it work for you? Sure, the numbers say it does. You win a lot. You produce a lot. But, I guess what I am saying is….you should lose even less! Start thinking – 2 steps back, forget the pressure for 2 seconds….and see….just see everything that is before you. Don’t see the rush. See ALL your options. See that your guys are open all over the place – and unleash that cannon. I promise, good things will happen. A lot more easy buckets. You are just working too damn hard. And I saw while I was there…..Singer gameplanned for you. And he got a Jewball out of it. The key is to neutralize the Singers and Munches of the world by getting rid of that ball in 2 seconds. 
Speaking of working too hard, no one makes it easier for himself than Gronk. His understanding of the mechanics of being a QB – the simplification of the data in his mind – jumps off the page when you watch him play. Probably why he is always smirking. He almost doesn’t understand why the opposing QB wouldn’t do exactly what he is doing. Hike, step back, get rid of the ball. 
Anyway, I did see the whole Game 2 and it was a good one. Back and forth until the end. The first five possessions were for scores. Some sloppiness on the defense. Whether it be guys sneaking behind the safety (Ross?) or running for extra yards after the catch (Daveo?) It was a lot of Gronk and Storm in the early going for stats. I recall a quintessential Goldberg stiff-arm fest that was just spectacular. Prime was working it with Pray. Honestly, my memory of the details at some point gets hazy. Was really cold and I started talking to Ivry about how we are basically NFL players. Anyway, Gronk was up 5-3 and looking unstoppable on offense. I though the game was over. Think all of a sudden the entire Dark Team decided they didn’t want to lose. Salem and Beast poured on the sacks (2 apiece) and Pray found running lanes. Honestly, in a flash it was 6-5 Dark. The game ended on a Goldberg P6  from Dark’s 8, to make it seem like the game was closer than it was. Prime gets the Jewball for the offensive outburst and the W. 
Who wants Week 15?

Week 13 Recap

A little more than three years ago, I wrote a woe-is-me recap following a Turkey Bowl during an otherwise lost season. A season where Jewball may have hit its lowest point – having joined Croton – just so that games would be played and the name Jewball would survive. I missed the end of that season with a torn tendon in my finger (courtesy of Goldberg) but….was no great loss. Jewball was no great prize. Fixed the tendon, rehabbed it back….and the past few seasons have been such a miracle – icing on the cake of my career playing this game. Thank you all for giving me a way to get injured that feels entirely worth it as well as the motivation to put in the work and come back better than ever. I have a birthday this Saturday. I will be 43 and ready to kick ass when I come back – whether it be in a month or next season. Long live Jewball.
Week 13 was a League Week and that meant the usual increased intensity going in. We had the heavyweight battle at 8am with Birds taking on Feit Club, followed by a contest between two reeling squads, 193 and Ass Men.
I’ll be honest – it was cold at Lawrence High School at 8am, but I expected a bigger crowd for this bout. I was there….eventually with Sting, but that was about it. Pray against Feit in a game with stakes! Come on, Jewballers! League action at its finest.
But…y’know what? Maybe the fans stayed away because they knew what I did not. That the action would be limited. Sure, there were productive drives – but most of them stalled. And I’m not even sure if I could give credit to either defense. I think the theme for the day was missed opportunities. QBs and receivers just missing their marks. Open targets overthrown. Open receivers not targeted. No need to create the tension where there was none. For the majority of the game, it was all Feit Club. Feit to Mighty for two TDs and two more almost TDs  (just out of the reach of Mighty going full blazing speed). Kut and Gronk being super disruptive and sacking Pray off nonstop. Daveo with a timely pick. Even without a game changer in Beast, the Feit Club came to play and cemented themselves as the top team in Jewball 2020-2021. That is not to say that the Birds couldn’t have won this game. Vegh, even with his TD…which only came off a Mighty tip – did struggle a bit early on in making much needed clutch grabs for his Birds. It was Prime being the most reliable and professional of the Birds’ receivers – showing the kind of game needed to get the Birds to the promised land. Goldberg matched that intensity once in the game and it was on that scoring drive – a joyful, gritty display of stiff arming. Ken Yirbu. In the end, it came down to a final drive. Pray and his Birds with an opportunity to tie. Pray, as he did most of the game, earned some very hard fought first downs with his legs (although in my opinion – his success will be measured on him becoming better at getting rid of the ball quicker, throwing from the pocket, and finding that opening man in his first progression) – and with the clock wound down – and a 4th and goal from the 20 he threw a prayer to his tallest receiver. Actually, a catchable ball for Goldberg – but no catch made. Birds lose and I got lucky since I didn’t need to argue about overtime…..or so I thought. Bottom line: Birds and Feit club basically played to a draw, but Feit Club wins because –generally – they wanted it more. Jewballs to Kut and Gronk for the 8 sacks. Keeping Pray from running free, making up for the last minute loss of Beast, and showing what “wanting it more” looks like. Please send a charity each to the main chat. Let’s change the world, Jewballers.
So, let’s address the rules for a second. I respect that clarity is needed. I ask you to respect that there may not be a clear rule – essentially because there has never been. Yes, all Vets are correct – we play last licks. I’m not going to argue that. But let’s also acknowledge that other factors have come into play. The time. Who has to leave.  Of course the score (big difference of whether we are playing for the tie or the win). I will begin with the most obvious point: We have never had League Games before. So, with all due respect the Vets, to compare a League Game – which by its nature is different – to the prior 20 or so years of Jewball is already a flawed pursuit. That is first consideration. So what is different between League and non-League. I would look at 2 things 1.) Schedule and 2.) Critical outcome. Two things that matter less in average Week. Meaning, with Leagues….we have 14 people waiting to get on and start on time and because there are seeds, we would like a winner and a loser (of course that didn’t happen in Game 2 for other reasons).
So, without explaining further why I said – if Pray scored, we would go to a tie breaker OT from the 25 (with Feit Club getting ball last) – I am merely here to address and enlighten that additional considerations were at play above and beyond what Jewball “usually” does.
To Game 2. First off, always great seeing Flash return to our game. He brings an energy, warmth, and star quality that truly lights up a field. When he ran around to everyone on the Ass Men to say whats up before the game, Is said, “See…this guy is just too nice.” He looked at me and replied, “Yeah, but I’m also a killer.” Well, it’s true – he is, but so is Munch.
The headline story with Game 2 was Malik and Rabin missing their guys all over the place – occasionally making a big play – and just doing enough to tie. The real story was Solo and Munch – absolutely terrorizing their opposing QBs and collapsing on screens. Munch, with fury and violence. Solo, with violence and fury. Malik, usually a major threat to break off a huge run at any moment was completely kept in check by Munch, MK, and Singer. Rabin was kept in check by putting just a bit too much on the ball. On a play that may have sealed the win for the Ass Men, a  flea flicker to Storm set up a pass to Jordan on a 3rd and long, but the pass was over thrown and Jordan tore a muscle leaping for it. A play later, Jordan blew his coverage and Malik found Danny deeeeeep for a 193 score. Afew plays later, Solo tackled Rabin and hobbled the Ass Men QB. With the clock having run, with the injuries and the ineptitude – the two teams had enough – calling it a draw. Congrats to 193 for the non-loss. What to build on.
Who wants Week 14?

Week 12 Recap

Week 12 marked the end of the flurry of games we call Bowl season. A series of 6 games within about 10 days. It’s always great when we can pull off all 6, and this year – once again – we did. 

Last Sunday was a cold one but not windy and the sun peaked through the clouds once in a while. The kind of January weather you cannot complain about as a Jewballer. 

There was a threat of rain and it was decided to have the 8am game start on time and Game 2 to start immediately thereafter. It kind of happened. The early game did not start on time because someone was a bit late. Guys, we need to enforce punctuality for Game 1, especially for the guys who claim they want both. Anyway, the game started on time-ish and it was once again, the best contest Jewball has going right now. Feit v. Pray. When I arrived it was 2-1 Feit and I was told Beast was in line for a Jewball. Had a score already and a pick. He later would score again. And add a game ending pick. Unfortunately, there are no Jewballs for ties….and this one was another tie. I don’t ever remember our game having this many weeks with tie scores at the buzzer. I don’t remember how Pray tied up the game entirely but I saw Singer make a wicked good grab running up the gut of the defense and gathering in a floating ball from Pray with one arm while fighting people off in the endzone. As pretty a TD as u will see. No stats were had for the rat and he doesn’t get his precious W. Overall….a very good game with an unsatisfying conclusion. On to Game 2 which did see some rain but nothing that made it ever remotely worth canceling.

Rabin in Colora was the starter against Gronk. In short, Rabin was at his worst and Gronk was at his best. Gronk had the swagger of Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes combined. Just totally confident and in control. Running his offense commandingly. He threw a TD to every single one of his recievers….2 to Tom. On the other side, Rabin and Co were struggling. To move the ball. And really to defend. Pulling flags was a disaster. Every run was successful, with the first and second defender encountered coming up empty handed. Colors found themselves in a hole and just staring at their hands wondering why the flags weren’t popping. The rain may have played a factor, but no excuses. 

Speaking of no excuses, a QB who can’t move the ball for his team is a problem. So Pray took over for Colors. For a while the dynamic of the game did change. In a span of twenty minutes, Pray threw a TD to Storm, had two P6s and rushed for a score. Colors got within one of Dark. But Gronk just effortlessly piled on. Salem for 50 yards and then a TD on the cross. A shuffle pass to Tom. Pray added a TD with Jordan late but Gronk put up 7 scores and  it was too much to overcome. Gronk with the Jewball for leading his team to an impressive offensive explosion. Leagues a comin…..

Week 11 – Jewball League Game 3 Recap

I watched the new Wonder Woman last night. Other than it being a waste of time, I made note of the most prominent theme since the movie was playing while Yaron was announcing his season ending injury. SPOILER ALERT: The theme of the movie is that a magical wish granting stone also takes from you what you currently have that is most valuable. Although I am 100% sure that Jewball is not a fictional magical wishing stone, I could not help but feel both blessed and cursed this season. We are halfway through – and it has been one of our best seasons. The positive storylines are overwhelmingly great. Incredible interest in the game. The battle with the soccer guys. The best talent we’ve ever had. EVER. BY A LOT. The return of Marino (and Klink as a “regular”). The addition of a great rookie class. Dobs engagement. The League Weeks. I really could go on. At the same time…..we are missing guys because of Covid. We are losing guys because of injuries.  We went from eliminating BOTH to likely needing it. It’s football – injuries happen – but in the past few weeks it has been one after another. I starts to weigh on you. I’m just hoping everyone heals up, rehabs up, and comes back.
WEEK 11 was a League Week and there was a lot of anticipation going in, with the undefeated Ass Men taking on a Feit Club at full power in Game 1. And In Game 2, we had the rising Birds of Pray taking the winless 193 – a team looking to get right. Yaron promising a win and putting his money where his mouth is.
The Ass Men came out with a lot of confidence, with all their talent on both sides of the ball – only Logan missing, but that is a big loss – he is their beating heart. Despite what you may have heard from Gronk, Feit Club is a team loaded with talent, but on Sunday  – when it came to offense, they were nearly a one dimensional team – Mighty being the ultimate weapon X on the field.
Ass Men started fast. Opening play was a 40 yard completion to Singer which eventually set up a 4th and short at the Feit Club 32. But Rabin overthrew Munch on the TE rollout and turned the ball over. It would be a while before the Ass Men would sniff the end zone again.  Feit was moving the ball easily with Gronk over the middle and screens to Mighty and the O Bros. He did have one receiver struggling to make catches, but I forgot that dude’s name. Feit Club was just picking apart the Ass Men zone. Although it did not always result in a score – as our fearless leader always commands us: BEND (over)! DON’T BREAK! Unfortunately, even with Bin barking at his team from the sidelines, they broke a few times. Mighty got into the secondary deep twice in the first half and both times, Feit found him. On the first of his 3 TDS, Mighty tipped a ball to himself with Singer right on him – Singer looking for the pick – but as Singer committed, the Rat adjusted – and wound up with the ball and no one behind him and the end zone. A few possessions later on the Ass Men 30, Feit sent two WRs deep and Mighty was all alone at the 10. Easy TD. 2-0 Feit Club at the half.
Ass Men made adjustments to start the second half on defense by putting MK in man coverage on Mighty. It proved to stifle Feit’s offensive scheming and the FC started the second half with a number of 3 and outs. Meanwhile Rabin was having some luck with his passing game, hitting Singer down the sideline for 37 yards, which set up a Jordan 40 yard run with great blocking out front to put the Ass Men on the board. It really felt like a momentum shift. But it all fell apart on the very next play. Feit and his pet Rat drove a stake through the Ass Men’s crack. With MK truly draped on Mighty who was flying down the right hash, Feit threw an incredible pass and Mighty made a catch that perhaps only he could make. In traffic between MK and Singer, the ball drops in to Mighty who maintains his throttle and focus to not only catch the ball, but avoid the collision with Singer….and wind up the last man standing, ball in hand…and the field in front of him. A score with twenty minutes left on the clock and Feit Club with a 3-1 lead.
The good news for Ass Men was the defensive really was clicking. Munch and O started bringing tons of pressure and Feit was getting sacked. Outside of a miracle Rat TD, FC had been held down for over 40 minutes. The only question was, will time run out.
Rabin got his team downfield with a Storm run followed by  42 yard Jordan jump ball over Steveo. The drive was capped by a Singer out – stiff arm – and TD. 3-2. But now only 5 minutes left on the clock and Ass Men behind.
Feit Club – who would get final possession regardless – drove the field methodically – but it stalled at the Ass Men 20 yard line. The clock had already run out and FC walked off the field with a hard fought and well-earned W. Ass Men take the L and by the end of the day, 3 teams were 2-1.
Considering the dynamic year he is having already, it is a surprise that Mighty has not gotten a Jewball yet, but today he gets one. 3 scores – 2 of them the kind of plays that only Mighty really makes. None bigger than the most difficult one – that destroyed the momentum AM had built.
Game 2 turned out to be not much of a game. Yaron looked unreal for the time he was in. 3 beautiful passes thrown. One turned into a TD with Sting. The other 2 – quite fittingly and sadly – were dropped. It has been a rough season for Yaron on many levels – none rougher than the most recent twist (no pun intended) – but he has been completely snake bit by inexplicable drops. No matter what team or what time – guys are dropping his passes. He does throw harder than any other QB in the league, but still….WRs need to catch passes. Period.
Until Yaron went down – the 193’s issue was less offense and more defense. Pray and his Birds looked unstoppable on offense. Literally, anything and everything they were trying worked. With weapons like Prime, Ross, Salem, Vegh PJs….he was using them all – completion after completion after completion. The 193 defensive scheme looked lost. And then their season looked lost. There was a party on the sideline trashing Yaron no matter what he did – even though he was doing great – but the party ended….when Yaron was writhing on the ground gripping his knee. He would eventually hobble off the field and head to the Urgent Care. There would be no miracle return this time. No popping back in. This would be a season ender. Wishing you, Yaron, and all our injured players – speedy and full recoveries! The rest of the game was a joke. Ross had a bunch of picks and scores. Same with Vegh. At one point Vegh was so disgusted by the one sided victory, he curled up into the fetal position and rolled around on the turf instead of catching a TD pass. Once again – I will keep the Jewball from Pray – who has his designs on Jewball MVP anyway – due to the standout performance by one of his weapons. That would be Ross. Ross is like Megatron, but likeable.
Who wants WEEK 12? Early, Late, or Both.